The Dangers of Putting Too Much Pressure on Kids

What is the reason for doing this?

Nowadays parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed. There are several reasons for these issues. One reason for this is development. We live in a tough competitive world now. As a result, all jobs require higher competencies and knowledge. If children do not struggle, it will be difficult for them to find a job in the future. Therefore, parents often force their children to study everything to improve their competencies. Another reason comes from love. Parents always want their children to have a better life. They think that being a successful person will bring a lot of opportunities for children. Besides, parents also hope that their children will complete their dreams which they couldn't achieve when they were young. Last but not least, parents often compare their kids to others. They do not want their kids to be worse than other children. If their kids can reach their goals, parents can be proud of them and tell their children's achievements to other parents. However, if parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed, it will be harmful to children's mental and physical growth. In conclusion, parents should put themselves in their kid's shoes to fully understand how difficult it is to give parents pleasure.

@ BlueBerry_vn
Based on this 95% of children are victims of their parents traditions because some of them are not are on children own ability they compare them with other children which causes them to not discover their potential.

some are educated based on what they have watched on TV and in other families which is wrong

Let's start with the basics. You are writing an academic essay whose minimum word count is 250-290 words. Writing less than those number of words will not be beneficial to your final score. Deductions will be applied for the missing word count. Next, you need to properly format the paragraphs. You have to present anywhere from 4-5 paragraphs, depending upon the original prompt instructions. You can never compress the discussion into one paragraph due to the sentence topic requirements and discussion presentation format. You have to present 3-5 sentences in each paragraph. The sentences need to be complete in terms of:

- Topic sentence
- Explanation
- Supporting discussions

You have not really addressed the topic in a properly developed paragraph. You have to review the formatting requirements for a task 2 essay. You can use the other essays available here as an example of how you properly address this academic essay writing task.

Firstly, you should divide your essay into separated paragraph to make it more clear
Secondly, you should try to express your idea by longer sentence.
E.g:
- Nowadays parents put ... There are several reasons ... --> it can be written such as: There are a variety of reasons explained why parents parents put too much pressure on their children to succeed.

- ... a better life, and they think that ...

First, there must be no contractions (like ''couldn't'') in an academic essay since it is formal writing. Second, I think you should try to express your ideas in longer sentences with specific examples and academic words more, that will upgrade your essay a lot. For me this is more like a speech, not an academic essay.