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"Where is my Desktop screen?"



jameslihaochi 1 / -  
Feb 14, 2009   #1
"Where is my Desktop screen?" when my mum turned her head to me, I really didn't dear to see her eyes. "Er, I------I am not sure," I grumbled, but it was not true. I know where the screen is------ it is in pieces stored in my bedroom.

Since I was as little as not able to reach the desk, I was used to be called a curious boy by people around me because I have had a habit to observe what happened in my life and explore the reason of it seriously.

I loved to play with mechanical toys, but sometimes it may be a little bit difficult for my parents to buy me a gift because they need to consider what gift will last longer imagining that I was waiting at home with screwdriver in my hand.

As to the screen, since I really wanted to know the reason why it was shining even when I turned the light off and gave us moving graphs on it, I did a lot of research as reading cyclopedias, "100,000 questions and why", and even the instruction book of a computer, then I knew it was my turn to open up one screen myself and have a look at the inside of it------

According to the same reason, I was able to change the lights safely in my home when they were broken; I was able to repair bicycles for my friends before I knew how to ride them. When my friends started to play with electric cars at home, I have already put an electric engine onto the model plane made by my hand.

As I grew up, I gradually grew up, I learned that to be an excellent engineer, one does not only need to have interest in how to handle and make machines, but also should need to be precise and logical with professional knowledge learnt from school.

I am very confident to say that I am an excellent student in all my school life. I have always been doing pretty good job in all my classes that I have taken, especially in Math. Since I come to America, I have received two Certificate of Merits from different professors in Mathematical department as proves of the excellent job that I have done and for suggest of joining the Math major.

My parents, teachers and even my friends all always believe that I was born to become a mechanical engineer, same as I do.
If someone ask me what major I am attending in America, for me, there is no doubt: Mechanical Engineering.

EF_Sean 6 / 3460  
Feb 15, 2009   #2
"Desktop screen" Um, do you mean "monitor" perchance?

"they need to consider what gift will last longer given that I'm probably waiting at home with screwdriver in my hand." Excellent.

You have quite a few grammatical errors here. Go through and revise to ensure you have used the proper tense for each verb. For instance "I have always done a pretty good job in all my classes that I have taken."
EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Feb 15, 2009   #3
...but sometimes it may have been a little bit difficult for my parents to buy me a gift, because they need to consider what gift would last longer -- imagining that I was waiting at home with screwdriver in my hand.

Maybe it would be better if you mentioned what age you were in these anecdotes... how young?

As for the screen, since I really wanted to know the reason why it was shining even when I turned the room's light off, and how gave us moving graphs on it. I did a lot of research, such as reading encyclopedias, "100,000 questions and why", and even the instruction book of a computer. That was when I knew it was my turn to open up one screen myself and have a look at the inside of it------

It was because of that passion for mechanics that I was able to change the lights safely in my home when they were broken; I was able ...

I like how clear you are about your intended field of study!! Keep working on those verb tenses! Good luck
melat 1 / 3  
Feb 18, 2009   #4
Good work!I just wish I could write like you.


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