Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


[WRITING TASK 1 IELTS] THE DIAGRAM SHOWS HOW LIVERTON DOCKS CHANGE SINCE 1980



mal880 1 / -  
Aug 4, 2024   #1
The given illustration illustrates the changes occured in Liverton docks from 1980 up to the present

Overall, this location had been significantly redeveloped, with all the industrial facilities being converted to recreational, entertainment and residential areas on both the northen and sounthern banks of the river.

Regarding the uppper side, the whole area underwent a completely transformation from a working site to a location for recreational amenities and a social facility. In 1980, this area was characterized by 2 warehouses and 2 cranes, which interleaved with each other. After the renovation, all the mentioned facilities was demolished and 3 novel buildings namely education centre, sailing club and a kids playground was added in their original place from left to right order.

On the remaining side, there used to be a crane located in the south-west corner and a warehouse right next to it. Since 1980, however, the crane was replaced by a hotel and a newly built apartments was constructed in place of the old warehouse. Moreover, a parking facility appeared next to that apartment, accompanied by a river walk stretches along the river bank. Finally, the river also witnessed enourmous changes, in which all the ships are replace by a large ship museum and a brige which connects two sides of the river was built, adjacent to a flood barrier.


  • baipostmapproces.png


Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15393  
Aug 6, 2024   #2
up to the present

There are only 2 illustrations provided for this report. One from 1980 and the other, is present day. So you cannot indicate that the changes are referring "up to preset". There needs to be a series of illustrations, providing changes over several years, for your statement to be valid as a reference for the changes provided. This is an incorrect summary overview. While it is well presented as a sentence, the incorrect information is the actual problem in the sentence.

Regarding the uppper side

Use the complete reference since there is a compass indicated. This is the upper North side. Use all aspects and images that are provided along with the image to help you achieve full reporting clarity and offer a better understanding to the reader.

You need to write shorter bud highly descriptive sentences for the paragraphs. Your essay is too wordy and would be difficult to complete in 20 minutes during the actual test. Keep it short.


Home / Writing Feedback / [WRITING TASK 1 IELTS] THE DIAGRAM SHOWS HOW LIVERTON DOCKS CHANGE SINCE 1980
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳