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"Should fatherhood ought to be emphasised as much as motherhood" - ILETS exam


Alisha123 9 / 18  
Jun 30, 2011   #1
"Fatherhood ought to be emphasised as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up."

To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Answer:

No one can deny the truth that Mother plays a vital role in upbringing of child. She gives so much scarifices at early and even later stage of life to make her child a good human being. However, in today's modern fast paced era, Father also act a prodominent part in raising his child. So, I am absolutely in favor of this new notion 'FatherHood'.

In the past, Mother seemed to be more attached with child since birth as she was always around child to fulfil the basic needs of child. On the other hand, father used to give financial support to child by working hard to fulfil the basic needs of child like food, education and other necessary demands of child. Now this trend has been changed, nowadays, profound number of women have entered into worforce, so mothers are not able to give as much time as they used to give in early times.

This drastic change in lifestyle, has compelled both parents to be equally responsible for raising their children. Also, today's stringent education system requires both parents attention to be given to children. For example, new difficult concepts has been added to Mathematics course which are harder for a typical bachelor mother to understand. So, here father has to spare time to teach his child to get good grades and remain competitive in studies.

Both Fathers and Mothers possess strengths and skills that are important for upbringing their children socially and intectually. Both share equal responsibilties for making their child one of the successful person in life.
Becool 4 / 6  
Jun 30, 2011   #2
Hi Alisha, I agree with Geenesh. I think you should focus on the format of the essay as he mentioned.
I noticed some grammatical errors.

In the past, Mother seemed to be more attached with a child since birth as she was always around the child to fulfil the basic needs of the child.

Father also actacts/plays a prodominent part in raising his child.

This drastic change in lifestyle "," has compelled both parents to be equally responsible for raising their children. The part before comma is the subject of the sentence, so you do not need to put comma there.

Focus on grammer. Do not panic with your mistakes, we all learn from mistakes.
OP Alisha123 9 / 18  
Jul 1, 2011   #3
Thanks alot for helping me out. I have just started the preparation for ILETS exam..
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jul 2, 2011   #4
CAPITALIZATION:
Do not capitalize mother.
Sometimes you will see it capitalized if it is used like a name:
She told her brother, "If you hit me again, I will tell Mother."
But if you use it in a way that is not like a name, do not capitalize:
She told her brother, "If you hit me again, I will tell our mother."
Do you see the difference?

One way, it is capitalized because it is like a name:
She told her brother, "If you hit me again, I will tell Pete."
She told her brother, "If you hit me again, I will tell Mother."

REFERRING TO FATHERS AND MOTHERS:
In this situation, use the plural form to show that you are referring to all fathers and mothers:
In the past, mothers seemed to be more attached with child since birth, as she was always around child to fulfill the basic needs of child. On the other hand, fathers used to be expected to give financial support to child by working hard to fulfill the basic needs of the child, like food, education, and other necessary demands. of child. ---The plural form helps you to show that you are talking about all fathers and mothers.

:-)


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