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Too much of financial dissonance in this world


fidel123 1 / 1  
Jan 13, 2017   #1
IELTS TASK 2

should wealthy nations be required to share their wealth among poorer nations by providing such things as food and education? or is it the responsibility of the governments of poorer nations to look after their citizens themselves?

A slice of big wealth for poor nations



As the citizens of one's country, being need in food and education is the fundamental things which the government has responsibility for it either the nation is poor or rich. This essay will first discuss which elements should be shared by the wealthy nation and it will address the question of the responsibility of the poor nation.

Rich countries should share their fortune with the poor country, because the people of powerful nations likely to have a prosperity life and it is a heart broken feeling if the well-being country turn their back on the poverty issues faces by developing country. The elements can be shared towards poor nations besides food and education are the economic investment and technology. For example, the Saudi Arabia Government help people in Africa and Afghanistan by facilitate them with electricity.

With regards to the question of the responsible of government on the citizens of the poor nations, i think this is the ordeal responsibilities should be lived in by the certain government. On the other hand, government should manage other ways to approach the problems in order to reduce the number of million people starving over time by coorporate with the United Nations. Furthermore, United Nations will be the referee in leading and connecting rich nations to poor to observe the part that can be helped. For instance, Germany promised to support the education for Syrian refugees by providing them with scholarships.

In conclusion, government of poor nations should look after the pupils themselves, however fortunate nations should give a hand to cut off the percentage of people who living under the poverty line.

jaikrishna 5 / 8 1  
Jan 13, 2017   #2
by facilitate them with electricity

by facilitate them with electricity = by facilitating them with electricity.

Should repeated multiple times.

government of poor nations should look after the pupils themselves

There are grammatical mistakes in forming sentences.

As the citizens of one's country, being need in food and education is ... = Being a citizen of one's country, food and education are the fundamental necessities. Either the nation is poor or rich, government has the responsibility to fulfill the basic needs.
OP fidel123 1 / 1  
Jan 13, 2017   #3
@jaikrishna
Thank you :) i will learn how to form a good sentence.
krempetkov 13 / 29 6  
Jan 14, 2017   #4
Your structure is good. On the other hand, you have made many grammar mistakes and I think you should work on that part of your writing.

As the citizens of one's country, being need in food - written like that this sentence doesn't make any sense. You should restructure your whole sentence

.... faces by developing the country

.... by facilitating them with electricity.

....On the other hand, the government should

..... over time by co-operating with the United Nations.

government of poor nations - the governments!


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