Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


IELTS Task 2 : The first car appeared on British roads.



tiaDS 73 / 222  
Feb 5, 2014   #1
The first car appeared on British roads in 1888. By the year 2000 there may be as many as 29 million vehicles on British roads. Alternative forms of transport should be encouraged and international laws introduced to control car ownership and use. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Throughout the world, when the cars have become the completely means of transport in the daily activity, Britons are difficult to do some activities without private form of transport. Moreover, there is the significant growth of cars in the British main roads and the prediction the proportion of cars would grown slightly in over 1 century since the first time car appeared on British main road in 1888. Obviously, some question rise whether alternative public transport should be encouraged and international regulations should be created to tackle traffic problem. I tend to agree with this statement, although there are some critic claims.

A car was the significant innovation in the early 100 years ago and it was a luxury form of transport. Take one example, when American people attempted to carry out bee colonies, they got many obstacles and one of obstacle was the means of transport. In the first experiment American people used a river to deliver the nests, but it was failure. Moreover, railroad had chosen to transmit the nest, but it spent long time and many nests were damage and bee colonies were dead. On the other hand, when car had used, it succeeded to tackle all of problems to emigrate bee colonies from Egypt to America. Based on this evidence, many people argue that governments should not create laws which prevent Britons using private car, because they believe that cars are needed to be used not only for helping them in the daily routine, but also taking part in their business. So, the regulation should not introduce to manage car ownership and use.

While several people have an opinion that the regulation of car ownership will be a trigger of new case, I really agree that alternative means of transport and international laws of car ownership are to make as the best way to tackle a dramatic increase of vehicles exactly on British main roads and other parts in the world. For instance, in my country, Indonesia, has a crucial problem about traffic congestion and our governments establish a solution to implement alternative public transport such as bus way, monorail and MRT to tackle this problem. Moreover, Singapore governments have a regulation for sharing car for people who drive a private car in the main road have to invite one or two passengers and in America has a no traffic zone which forbidden for cars across this zone. Other is vehicles' fume which has made air pollution and then we have to realize that the means of transport which used in past did not consume fuel as much as cars are today.

In conclusion, the overall growth of means transport will give many bad effect for many countries especially in Britain. So, governments should hold a responsibility to encourage alternative public transport and introduce a law which prevents car ownership and use to resolve traffic jam and to keep economic sector.

SHanafi 120 / 357  
Feb 5, 2014   #2
the prediction the proportion

better you put preposition between them

I tend to agree with this statement, although there are some critic claims.

I think its unnecessary

Take one example

I prefer this suitable for speaking

of means transport will give many bad effect for many countries especially in Britain .

I get confused about your conclusion, what do you want to refer especially in Britain after mention case from several places.

but overall, I like the way you compose your idea
dumi 1 / 6793  
Feb 5, 2014   #3
Throughout the world, when the cars have become the completely means of transport in the daily activity, Britons are difficult to do some activities without private form of transport.

Well, you need to introduce your prompt first. Why didn't you tell the reader about the tremendous progress of car usage took place in Britain from 1888 to 2000. It's the core of this argument and without talking about that your introduction would look pretty incomplete.

The objective of the introduction is to quickly introduce the prompt to the reader in the clearest possible manner, but very briefly.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 : The first car appeared on British roads.
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳