Unanswered [0] / Urgent [0] / SERVICES
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

IELTS Task 2 - Foreign languages not only for travellers or abroad workers


nokia1995 1 / -  
Mar 4, 2019   #1

different reasons for multilingualism



Some people say that the only reason for learning a foreign language is in order to travel to or work in a foreign country. others say that these are not the only reasons why someone should learn foreign language. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

There is no doubt that language has played an integral role in creative thinking of civilizations. While some people are of the view that a foreign language is necessary only to travel and work in a foreign country, others argue that it should not be limited to these two criterions only. I tend to agree with the latter view and in this essay, I will elaborate on it.

Firstly, language becomes a major hurdle for people who travel to foreign countries for work or otherwise. They are unable to communicate with the local community which results in them being confused, lonely and feel like an outsider. Whereas, if they have learnt the language then they become better equipped to intermingle with the natives of the country and adapt to their culture and customs. Working there becomes less of a fuss for them and they build good relations with their colleagues and neighbors.

Nevertheless, the horizon for learning a new language should not just end there. There are many people who are enthusiastic for it. They have a passion to learn languages and it drives them to pursue it wholeheartedly. Furthermore, learning a foreign language enables a person to befriend people over the internet and get an insight of their culture and world views. For instance, a lot of marriages have taken place in the last decade following the couples meeting over the internet and learning each other's languages and cultures.

In conclusion, Although some people argue that travelling and working in a foreign country are the only reasons to learn a new language, I strongly believe that there are many other avenues to explore for example making friends online and building strong bonds as well as following passion of new languages for some people who end up becoming teachers.

Holt - / 7,546 2001  
Mar 5, 2019   #2
Ashraf, your essay did not address the prompt discussion correctly. One only has to compare the original discussion instruction with your paraphrase of the same line to see why you failed to address the task effectively:

Original Instruction: Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
Paraphrase: I tend to agree with the latter view and in this essay, I will elaborate on it.


You forgot that this is a 3 reasoning paragraph essay composed of:
1. POV 1
2. POV 2
3. Personal opinion

Your discussion went straight for the last discussion point instead, which created a tangential response for the essay. Therefore, you will only be scored for the area of the essay that you did respond to, with points deducted for not addressing the first 2 discussion points. Due to the deductions, it may be extremely difficult for your essay to receive passing marks.

In addition to this problem, you also failed to completely paraphrase the original discussion. The following phrase: "to travel and work in a foreign country" is a cut and paste from the original. You need to change the total presentation of the original prompt. That means you cannot use even a few words from the first version of the discussion presentation. Use your own words to create a new and unique paraphrasing presentation.

While the problems of your essay seem minimal, these errors actually have the power to fail you in the testing process. Be aware of what the prompt requirements are and discuss accordingly. Create totally new presentations of the original discussion as well to show your English comprehension and LR skills.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 2 - Foreign languages not only for travellers or abroad workers