The given figure shows the birth rates during the period from 1920 to 2000 in China and the USA.

birth rates in china and usa

The figure is given shows the birth rates during the period from 1920 to 2000 of China and the USA.

Overall, the fertility of the USA was highest in 1950 reaching a peak of 15 per cent compared to the rate peak at the same rate in China in 1935. In addition, both nations saw considerable fluctuation that also has sharply decreased since 1960.

The birth rates of China was dramatically decreased from 1935 to 1940 (15% and 5% respectively) compared to from 1940 to 1945 in the USA was plunged to low of just 5 per cent. On the other hands, China's birth rate was not changed at 5 per cent. Both in the USA and China was followed by a period of exponential growth in 1950 (20% and 15% respectively).

In contrast, since 1950, China fell abruptly the next five years to under 10 rates, whereas, in the USA was sharply decreased to under 15 rates.
A glance at the graph provided reveals some striking similarities from 1960 to 2000. Furthermore, the birth rates of both countries have fluctuated between 5 and 10 respectively since 1970. The fertility's lowest in China was becoming less than behalf of 5 per cent in 1980 and 2000. (206 words)

Helps me what I am wrong in this essay, thanks for your comments, that helps me to improve a lot. Sincerely.

• 
  Capture.PNG
  

For the third paragraph, did you mean to put rates instead of percent?

Also, I feel that it's better to write "rates IN the USA and China" instead of "Rates of the USA and China"

Other than that, this is very well written