Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


If a goal is worthy, then any means taken to attain it is justifiable. GRE.



jojony1 4 / 5  
Aug 9, 2015   #1
I AM PRACTICING FOR THE GRE IF U CAN GIVE ADVICE AND A GRADE I TIMED MYSELF FOR 30 MINS AND DID NOT CORRECT BELOW IS THE GRE TOPIC

If a goal is worthy, then any means taken to attain it is justifiable.

A goal is something that you set in motion to achieve whether it be losing weight, marrying the man of your dreams, or climbing the corporate latter. Accomplishing a goal is one of the greatest feelings that one can have. However, it is about how you go about achieving that goal that matters. Taking any means to accomplish a goal is never justifiable.

Woman all over the world fawn over super models and their amazing bodies praying even that they can attain a similar look. Some of these of women set goals to achieve the super model quote on quote look. Setting a goal to have a certain body type is good because it gives you motivation to workout and eat healthy, which we all should do. However, when this goal becomes obsessive and you begin to starve yourself because the weight is not coming off that is never justifiable. Starving is never okay to attain a certain body type. The goal is to love yourself and accept yourself at any size not to harm your body for a look that you may never even attain.

Other goals may be to marry the man or woman of your dreams that you let slip from your life because at the time you were not ready for a relationship. As time went by you grew to miss this person and realized that they are the only person you can imagine spending the rest of your life with. Setting a goal to win them back maybe taking them on a romantic vacation or letting them know in a meaningful way how much they mean to you is great to do. On the other hand, if this person is in a meaningful relationship and you try to jeopardize what they have to win them back that is never a goal that is acceptable. This person will never see what you did as something meaningful to get them back but evil.

On the contrary, there can be goals that you do whatever is necessary to accomplish them. However, you do so with dignity and honor in a way that you can be proud of how hard you worked to achieve it. Maybe you want to be the next chief doctor at a major hospital, and you work extra hard proving to the best of your ability that you have what it takes to become chief doctor of the hospital. This is a goal that you can walk away knowing that you did whatever was necessary without harming others or yourself.

Goals are great to set and accomplish. It is how you go about finishing them that matters. Goals are not made to harm, but to propel you to best version of yourself whether that be transforming your body, marrying your soul mate, or becoming chief doctor.

ChristineB - / 91  
Aug 12, 2015   #2
Hello. I'll help you with your style.

However, it is about how you go about achieving that goal that matters.

Try not to start sentences with "however." Here's an alternative way to write that sentence:

However, it is about howHow you go about achieving that goal is what reallythat matters.

Women all over the world fawn over super models and their amazing bodies praying even that they can attain a similar look.

"Supermodels" should be one word. There should be a comma after "bodies." You don't need "even." Let me show you:

Women all over the world fawn over super modelssupermodels and their amazing bodies, praying even that they can attain a similar look.

Setting a goal to have a certain body type is good because it gives you motivation to workout and eat healthy, which we all should do. However, when this goal becomes obsessive and you begin to starve yourself because the weight is not coming off that is never justifiable.

"Work out" should be two words. I'm going to show you how to combine these two sentences into one to improve your style.

Setting a goal to have a certain body type iscan be a good thing because it gives you motivation to workoutwork out and eat healthy, which we all should do.;However,it is when this goal becomes obsessive and you begin to starve yourself because theto lose weight is not coming off that isthat the means to achieving the goal become unjustifiablenever justifiable .

The goal is to love yourself and accept yourself at any size not to harm your body for a look that you may never even attain.

The goal is to love yourself,and accept yourself at any size, and not to harm your body trying to achievefor a look that you may never even attain.

Other goals may be to marry the man or woman of your dreams that you let slip from your life because at the time you were not ready for a relationship.

This sentence doesn't go with the theme of your essay. How does letting a potential spouse slip from your life represent using extreme, unjustifiable means to achieve a goal? I think you need to "connect the dots" better if you use this example. Reading ahead, maybe what you meant to convey is something like this:

Another example of using extreme methods of achieving a goal is when someone tries to recapture the attention of an old flame by trying to interfere in his or her new relationship.

I hope this has helped you!


Home / Writing Feedback / If a goal is worthy, then any means taken to attain it is justifiable. GRE.
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳