The government should spend money on public services, but investment in the arts is not unnecessary

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money

People hold different ideas on government investment. While I agree that the government should spend money on public services, I do not think that investment in the arts is unnecessary.

It is true that public services play a vital role in community life which provide certain services like health care and transports to all people regardless of income. In other words, public services ensure that everyone have equal access to the services they need. If the public services are upgraded on a regular basis by government investment, quality of people life will be improved accordingly. Medicare system in Canada, for example, offers free health services to all Canadians regardless of religion or financial status. Since they do not worry about paying extra money for health cost, they can take the primary health care approach to preventing health problems. This is the reason why the rate of death caused illness in Canada is (much) lower than other countries. Therefore, public services should be taken into government's account first before deciding to invest in other ones.

People hold different ideas on government [...] that investment in the arts is unnecessary. [ Alternative way to say last two sentence" While I agree that the government should rather spend money on public services than on art stuffs ; such as music and theatre". [PLUS],let me explain more detail in the following paragraph ]

... transports to all people regardless of [their] income. In other words, public services [can] ensure that everyone have[has] equal access to ...
... on a regular basis by[the ] government investment, quality ...
This is the reason why the rate of death [you can frankly say "dead rate or mortality rate"] caused by illness in Canada is lower than other countries.

... for that reason funding for [in] arts like preserving heritages.

... besides arts also should be"another factor to be concerned" [I added some big words to make your sentence more attractive;] concerned.

Dear Jenny,

You have a great idea on writing an essay. I believe that you will get top TOFLE scores soon. However , there are still some mistakes; mostly caused by GRAMMAR.I have also put some alternative sentence to make your sentence more clearer. My suggestion is "if you still have time before the exam, please take your time to revise your grammar.

Cheer
John

"Alternative way to say last two sentence" While I agree that the government should rather spend money on public services than on art stuffs ; such as music and theatre

Thanks @humangun for your suggestion, but I think your alternative introduction is not reflected my point and linked with the body content.