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Should government spend more money in support of the arts than in support of the athletics?


thehowfanned 1 / -  
Aug 30, 2019   #1
Question:

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?


Governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics such as state-sponsored Olympic teams.
Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.


Some people believe that government should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of athletics. Nevertheless, I disapprove of the statement because of the importance of athletics and the fame of a country, people who excel in sport and differences between arts and sports game industry.

First of all, it is undoubtedly important for a country to support athletics. Fame is likely to be one of the reasons. For example, I live in Taiwan and know that Taiwan has its own baseball league who goes abroad for baseball games. Meanwhile, attending in these games allows Taiwan to be noticed by other countries. Therefore, good athletic activities is important for a country's fame.

In addition, there must be some people excelling in sport and deserve further support. For example, thanks to the government support of athletics, a female badminton player named Linda became famous in Taiwan because of her excellent playing skills, and finally had the chance to play in the Olympics. Consequently, ample government support can help the sport players reach higher levels and keep practicing hard.

Last but not least, there are differences between audience of the arts and the athletics industry. For example, people who take part in the art activities such as music concerts and painting exhibitions are always above the middle-class while people who have fancy for watching sports game come from all classes. As a result, it is weird if government spends less money in support of athletics.

In conclusion, because of the help that athletics do for a country's fame, people who excelling in sport and deserve government support and the differences between the audience of the arts and the athletics, I am opposed to the opinion that governments should spend more money in support of the arts than in support of the athletics.

Norbsidy 3 / 5 3  
Sep 5, 2019   #2
@thehowfanned

Hi, I have few observations regarding your essay. Minimize writing long sentences, sometimes it makes your essay difficult to understand. look at the second sentence in the first paragraph- Nevertheless, I disapprove of ....

ANOTHER ONE- In conclusion, because of the help ...

Also some words are wrongly used eg.- Consequently, ample government ... . Remember whenever your are using words like "consequently", it means your making reference to something that happened .For instance "he was sentence to life imprisonment as a consequence for killing someone.

Also work on your grammer and transition from one paragraph to another.

Goodluck.
@Norbsidy


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