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The Graduation Day... (the best day of my life)


bilal ABUZENAH 15 / 81  
Nov 11, 2009   #1
write about the best day in your life.

It such a regular day, but it has a different taste. You see people crying or laughing
on this day. Actually, that is what is happening in Jordan during the Graduation Day,
which we call the Result Day.

The Result Day is when the government announces the names of students who have
passed the standardized test, by posting them on the bulletin board of each school or
putting them on the websites.

In the summer of 2007, I was anxious to see my name among those who passed.
The night before that day, I hadn't slept well. I was worried a lot about the results.
Around 7 o'clock in the morning, I heard some fireworks, so I realized that the results
had been announced. I jumped from my bed and headed to the school without even
washing my face. After I reached it, the students were gathering at the bulletin board
looking up their names. I couldn't wait anymore, so I jumped over them to reach the
board and I saw my name. At that moment, I was overjoyed and my parents were too.

I really thank them for every thing they have done for me. I will never forget that
day when I saw my father's tears of happiness rolling on his cheeks. That day was the
best day in my life.
Noobert 1 / 3  
Nov 11, 2009   #2
in your 3rd paragraph, instead of short sentences, combine it, and "reached it", change "it" to something refering to school. perhaps "very happy" can be replaced too, maybe "thrilled" or "overjoyed"?
acat6332 4 / 12  
Nov 11, 2009   #3
at the end the sentence " i really thank him for everything, they have done for me" should not have the comma in the middle :)

and what is this for?
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Nov 12, 2009   #5
It such a regular day, but it has a different atmoshpere . You see people crying or laughing on this day. Actually, that is what is happening in Jordan during the Graduation Day, which we call the Result Day. The Result Day is when the government announces the names of students who have passed the standardized test by posting them on the bulletin board of each school or putting them on the websites.

Above, I made that all one paragraph.

In the summer of 2007, I was ... (very good paragraph!) At that moment, I was overjoyed , and my parents were too.

I really thank them for everything they have done for me. I will never forget that day when I saw my father's tears of ...

Beautiful. But what the heck is the prompt for this one? Does it fulfill the requirements?
OP bilal ABUZENAH 15 / 81  
Nov 12, 2009   #6
Thanks a lot kevin.

the prompt is:
write an essay about the best day in your life.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Nov 14, 2009   #7
Oh, I see. Well, that works well for it...


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