The graph shows how elderly people in the United States spent their free time between 1980 and 2010.

The line graph delineates the percentage of activities old people in the United States joined in their spare time over a course of
30 years, initiating from the year 1980s.

Overall, almost all examined activities witnessed an upward trend in the proportion except going to the theatre. Moreover, it is clear that the figure for hiking experienced the most significant increase.

As can be seen, in 19890s, 60% belonging to watching TV was the highest proportion, followed by 50% of going to the theatre and 30% of reading. Besides, the percentage of surfing the Internet ranked the lowest point with roughly 5% which was around 15% lower than the figure for hiking. By 2000s, while there was a continuous rise by about 10% in the percentage of watching TV and surfing the Internet. there was a slight fluctuation before the number of reading hit a trough of 20% and that of coming to the theatre registered 40%. In addition, the proportion of hiking climbed speedly to 60% in 2000s.

Throughout 10 examined years later, the statistic of watching TV marginally declined to over 60% which was around 5% higher than the figure for reading in 2010s. In contrast, the remaining provided numbers saw a growth, with that of hiking ranking the highest at 80% and the percentage of going to the theatre being the lowest with more than 40%.

Incorrect sentence structure. Year is singular, indicating one year (1980). 1980+s is plural indicating more than one year. GRA deduction.


Activities should have been enumerated either in the summary overview or the trending statement to complete the prior information sharing for the summarized information portion of the presentation.


The reader cannot see anything. They are not going to have a copy of the image. Always refer to the information without a placement or position inference.


You are comparing more than 1 set of information. The word should be in plural form (statistics)

While the information presentation is acceptable, it is the incorrect sentence structure throughout the essay report that will pull down the final score.

There are some grammar mistakes as far as I can judge. Overall, it looks good for the first paragraph. Please look out for the small grammar mistakes because these can be heavy on the scores. Best of luck!