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Have we harmed the Earth or made it a better place?


pearpear017 1 / -  
Jul 15, 2013   #1
Some people believe that the Earth is being harmed (damaged) by human activity. Others feel that human activity makes the Earth a better place to live. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

effect of human activities on our planet



Nowadays, global warming is the most important issue in every country. A large number of people think that any human activities cause damage to the Earth. However, many people believe that the Earth is better than ever due to human activities. Before identifying my opinion, careful discussion is required.

On the one hand, some human activities make the Earth to change for the worse. For instance, using air conditioning, driving, and deforestation for furniture bring about toxic pollution to the air. Those lead to climate change in the North Pole which the glacier is melted by effect of higher temperature from human activities. If people still do the bad activities, the Earth will be harmed and become to an unsolvable issue.

On the other hand, although some activities of human make trouble to the world, many activities help the world to be a better place. For example, many people around the world enjoy growing the plants and reduce to using paper and focus on recycle paper and plastic increasingly. It decreases air pollution and make temperature to go down. Moreover, some people like to ride bicycle which decrease the global warming too.

In the final analysis, human activities have both of benefits and drawbacks which depend on conscious of people that will choose to do which one. According to my opinion, I think that human activities can make the Earth to be a better place to live if people thing carefully before doing anything. I predict that the Earth will exist with us forever only people help together look after the Earth.

shadman19922 21 / 74 10  
Jul 15, 2013   #2
Well, I think you should post the word limit and any other constraints or instructions of the essay in order for better critique and comments.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Jul 15, 2013   #3
Nowadays, global warming is the most important issue in every country

... global warming is just one of the results of harmful human activities. So, this sentence tends to narrow down the topic to one specific outcome. I feel you should introduce the prompt first.

Before identifying my opinion, careful discussion is required.

.... express your position direct.
One more thing - You should post this type of essays into Writing Feedback forum. Also, have a meaningful topic in the Subject field. These things help you earn more feed backs.
April April 13 / 148 22  
Jul 15, 2013   #4
make the Earth to change for the worse

using air conditioningconditioners

bring about toxic pollution to the air. Those, which inturn leads to climate change

--> I don't get what you meant by "Those". Maybe revising the sentence like this will make the meaning clearer.

reduce to using

focus on recyclerecycling

which decreasesthe global warming

I predict that the Earth will exist with us forever only people help together look after the Earth.

--> I don't think this sentence is relevant.
I suppose this is a TOEFL essay, isn't it? If so, this essay is quite short. Also, you should state your opinion in the introduction.

Best
gmad06 20 / 151 55  
Jul 15, 2013   #5
Nowadays, global warming is the most important issue in every country. A large number of people think that any human activities cause damage to the Earth. However, many people believe that the Earth is better than ever due to human activities. Before identifying my opinion, careful discussion is required.

- don't use Global warming in your hook sentence.it's better to use it as a main idea on your body paragraph. It is not advisable to

use the phrases " a large number" or "a lot" use "many" or stick to your prompt "some" and "others". If you intend to state your opinion

in the conclusion paragraph, you don't need to mention "Before identifying my opinion" in the intro paragraph.
- use Global warming as your main idea in 1st body and support it with ideas on how human activities can contribute to it
- use another phenomenon (opposite to Global warming) which could benefit the world in the 2nd paragraph. Again, state some ideas on
how human activities can countribute to it.
- summarize everything in the conclusion and mention your opinion.

This is how it is done in IELTS, if this is what you intend to do...hope this helps..
Siderri 2 / 4 1  
Jul 16, 2013   #6
A piece advice. Go for your straight opinion on your intro. For me no need to state (Before identifying my opinion, careful discussion is required.). A direct point is more clear and precise...

I predict that the Earth will exist with us forever only people help together look after the Earth.-- it more good if it will be paraphrase... Earth...earth... And using the word forever within your prediction make another question?..

Hope it help a lot..


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