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IELTS - historic buildings are precious legacy to human development



Minnaliao 1 / -  
Jul 31, 2014   #1
Please help me to proofread this writing. Thank you in advance!

Too many old historic buildings are in danger and destroyed in many countries. What are the main reason? How to protect them?

As the development of modernization, ancient buildings are gradually disappearing around the world. They were the places where containing stories in the past. However, number of reasons that lead to people destroy those historic buildings.

First of all, historic buildings are not safe for people live in anymore. The frame of ancient buildings could be corrupted by various weathers, mice or worms. Especially for those wooden stairs in old buildings, they were weak when people step on the wooden pieces. In additionally, historic buildings rarely have fire alarm system. Fire event is most likely happening in these high risk buildings.

Moreover, ancient buildings are obstacles in the development of modern cities. There is a continuous mitigation of urban planning. Roads are broaden due to the significant increase of car uses. It is a pity that ancient buildings have been sacrificed in human development.

Nevertheless, people are struggling to preserve old buildings and there are numerous ways to protect them. Regularly maintaining the ancient buildings is a conserve strategy to extend the life-time of historic building. Furthermore, exterior appearance of building can stay old-fashioned while interior structure is changing. Such as State Library of Victoria has been refurnished only inside of the building. Fire alarm system is placed in this ancient building. It is still a popular landmark that attract thousands of tourists and local residents to visit everyday.

In conclusion, historic buildings are precious legacy to human development. Although it sometimes hinder the urban development, there are numerous of alternative solutions to protect historic buildings.

Word count: 255

dumi 1 / 6793  
Aug 1, 2014   #2
As the development of modernization, ancient buildings are gradually disappearing around the world.

"development of modernization"? I really don't get your idea :( You need to open your essay with an impressive hook that can grab the reader's attention towards your writing.

First of all, historic buildings are not safe for people to live in anymore. The framestructure of ancient buildings could becorruptedhave been damaged by various weathers, mice or worms.bad weather conditions and improper maintenance over the years


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