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IELTS: women's work / historic buildings / equal numbers of male and female students


Fardhani Putri 23 / 46 7  
Feb 1, 2014   #1
In some countries, it is common for women to find a job when their children are young. What one of the advantages and disadvantages of this.

In today's world when human right is the same with others, mothers tend to be workers. Consequently, they will leave their children alone at home. Therefore, if mothers find a proper job in their life, what the advantages and disadvantages which are given ?

Nowadays, historic buildings are destroyed to build new constructions. Is this a positive development? Explain your point of view!

As we know that we cannot step back in time to the ancient century which built many of the historical buildings. Different from the old days, now some people are destroying the historical area and build a new structure because they do not care about old buildings. This essay will discuss about the positive impacts and state my opinion.

Universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Every person has the same right to get proper education without seeing their gender and universities as the higher education have to accept the competence people without compare the number of students. In contrast, others think that universities should accept equal numbers for every gender in every subject, but I believe that universities have to accept the person who has good capability to get better education.

dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Feb 1, 2014   #2
In today's world when human right is the same with others, mothers tend to be workers.

Well, this hook is not so relevant to your topic. Also the phrase " human right is the same with others" is not specific enough to convey your idea. I feel this is not a strong hook.

As we know that we cannot step back in time to the ancient century which built many of the historical buildings.

... you have grammar issues here.
It sounds as if ancient century built historical buildings.

Every person has the same right to get proper education without seeing their gender(stop here) and universities as the higher education have to accept the competence people without compare the number of students

... don't lengthen your sentences unnecessarily. That disturbs your flow of ideas.
Every person has the same right to receive proper education irrespective of any gender discrimination.


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