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HULA DANCING. Hawaii is not only full of beautiful views, but it is also a rich culture.



bismillah 15 / 27  
Sep 21, 2016   #1
IELTS SUMMARY MONTH:HULA DANCING IN HAWAIIAN CULTURE

A great deal of people have a dream to visit the beautiful Hawai Island. Yes ,that certainly.There are many kinds were belonged to Hawai about culture,touristm place, and the last is stories.IT has culture which has devided to such as,dancer.It is related to the culture and tourism place considerably .For example,to appeal the tourist ,they perform with the graceful dance which WERE performed by almost females by grass skirt swaying their hips .

Hula dancing is a part of Hawaaiian life .It is such as ancient tradition that it was most likely originally performed in plain sign an altar to appreciate the gods and accompanied by great ritual. Furthermore, the Hula dances were devided to be the ancient and modern styles.

The ancient style is energetic dance performed to the accompanientment of the chants and beating of drums.But ,the both are almost similar ,which is becoming the difference of it are slower and more graceful were belonged to the modern style.

ibe13 36 / 38  
Sep 21, 2016   #2
hi syukron, here are my thoughts for you:

- there are several misspelling words such as Hawai // Hawaii , touristm //tourism , devided // divided , accompanientment // accompaniment , Hawaaiian // Hawaiian

Yes ,that certainly.There are many kinds were belonged to Hawai (...), and the last is stories. (this sentence has many main verb, so that you have to add connector or delete two main verb) IT has culture which ...

... they perform with the graceful dance which WERE performed by almost females ...
Furthermore, the Hula dances were devided toconsist of two style; the ancient and modern styles.
Giansy11 18 / 30  
Sep 21, 2016   #3
Hii Bismillah..
You can deliver well and make us as the reader understand your article.
But, i have some corrections of your summary,

A great deal of people whohave has a dream to visit the beautiful Hawai Island
IT has culture which has devidedto such as,dancer ( make it clear, divided to? )
...they perform with the graceful dance which WERE performed by almost females by wearing grass skirt ...

Furthermore, the Hula dances were devided divided to be the ancient ...
... dance performed to the accompanientment (?) of the chants and ...


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