Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


TOEFL Independent Task (1/185) - Why do you think people attend college or university?



liuzhengxian 2 / 1  
Dec 22, 2015   #1
Please help me to revise my essay. Feedbacks like structural, detail, paragraph development, and grammar problems are welcome.
Thank you.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q:
People attend college or university for many different reasons (for example, new experiences, career preparation, increased knowledge). Why do you think people attend college or university? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Pursuing higher education is becoming more and more prevalent nowadays. There are various reasons for people to go to university. In my opinion, I think the reasons why people attend university are gaining more professional knowledge, knowing more people, and gaining more new experiences.

First of all, people in university could gain more professional knowledge. There are miscellaneous classes in universities, and each of them contains much more specific and difficult knowledge than in high school. For example, Shakespeare is a playwright who only appears in one page in high school textbook. But in university, you can take courses about Shakespeare in kinds of perspective, such as drama, literature analysis, even philosophy of life attitude. Learning in university is possible for people to gain knowledge in a specific way, and it helps one to acquire more professional knowledge.

Secondly, knowing more people is another thrust for people to attend university. University is recognized as the symbol of freedom. Students in there could hold various activities which is the best way to know more people. For instance, students are encouraged to participate in clubs according to their interests and personalities. As a result, students are tended to make different friends having same interests in clubs. Besides, knowing more people like different classmates would be beneficial after entering a working environment. Take a reporter as example, if a reporter urgently needs someone to interview for their newspaper article, a call toward a classmate in biology class may solve the problem in time. So, knowing more people in university would be large supports in the future career and life.

Thirdly, people in university have numerous opportunities to try new things and gain more new experiences. As mentioned before, university is a place ensuring students great freedom. Hence, it is different from in high school, people have chances to do what they want. For example, people in university are not required to wear uniform like in high school anymore. Thus, they can try new types of looking to develop a personalized style. Some may try to wear some make-up or change their haircut. Every time they try new style, they will much understand which style is more suitable for them. Eventually, they will gain sufficient experiences to build up a personalized style.

In conclusion, people attend university for different reasons. In my view, university is a place where people could obtain professional knowledge, know more different people, and gain new experiences from every new trying. That's why people want to attend university.

Olivia33 3 / 3  
Jan 4, 2016   #2
Some consider attending university as a best way to gain professional knowledge. Some think entering ... SomeOthers think going to universities is a good way to learn new things. In my opinion, I think the reasons why people attend university are gaining more knowledge, knowing more people, and trying more new things.


Home / Writing Feedback / TOEFL Independent Task (1/185) - Why do you think people attend college or university?
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳