Investing on public transportation is preferable!

Nowadays with increasing the population in the entire world, need of people to transporting vehicles is increased. So, I believe that spite of importance of improving roads and high ways, developing the buses, trains or subways is more critical that governments should spend more money on it. My basic reasons for this idea are listed below.

As I mentioned above, with increasing the population shuttling the people is turn to a big problem in community; every day people spend most of their time in traffic and when they arrive to their work place they are so tired to do their duty. So, these issue causes that quality of their work be decreased. But, with improving the public transportation rate of using own cars would decrease and most of the people going to their work or every place through these vehicles. As a result, traffic would decrease in streets and people could arrive at their work in time and without tiredness for driving in traffic.

Additionally, with industrialization the cities and increase the number of cars in every where pollution of the air is threaded the people's health. There for, investing more on public transportation help greatly for declining a mounts of polluted air and improving the health of people.

Moreover, many of people cannot afford to buy a car; the poor people that live in cities or countries and consist most of the community, need to use transportation systems that have low expense. So, developing buses, trains or so on is necessary for this population.

In conclusion, although improving roads and high ways is important in cities and countries I personally think that investing in public transportation area is preferable and government should spent more money on this field.

Okay, maybe those corrections are hard to understand. Thanks, Sabrina! I wonder, though, if Mahrou has some questions about those corrections.

Nowadays with the increasing the population in the entire world, need of people to transporting people's need for transportation also increases. I believe that despite the i mportance of improving roads and highways , developing the buses, trains or subways is more critical, that and governments should spend more money on these. it . My basic reasons for this idea are listed below.

Moreover, many of people cannot afford to buy a car; the poor people that live in cities or countries and consist comprise most of the community need to use transportation systems that are inexpensive. have low expense. I chose to make a small improvement, here, but really, this is a very good sentence!

:-)

Hi Kevin

I think I can not be a good writer because sometimes I find something wrong with the essay, but I couldn't make it right. Maybe because I have not master how to wirte a good essay yet. I still try my best to develop my writing skill, it seems a little hard for me. I come across many grammar problem when I am writing. It's not easy to cope with them. I feel disapponited sometime.

==

I have good news for you...

Writing is art, and there are no rules. Also, communication is art. Do you know how Yoda talks on Star Wars? It is not grammatically correct, but it is powerful.

I want to tell you something from my perspective as someone who only knows English:
People from all over the world are changing the English language. Some people do not like the internationalization of the English language, but I think it is beautiful. I especially like Chinglish. Language is always changing. If you are someone whose English is not perfect, you can still be the best communicator in your company. Communication is not about grammar. Communication is about psychology, timing, and the ability to share a positive state of mind.

:-)

You have good points but they are a little too far fetched. As I read it I feel like you put bullets together and used conjunctions to make it look like a paragraph. The voice has little life in the writing and to persuade a society like "the people vs. government topics" it is good to have that ump in you're writing lol ;)

Hi Kevin
Thank you very much for your correction, Whould you please tell me that how is my writing? and what score you think that i can get in my TOEFL exam?

Hi Kevin

Thank you for your encouragment.

I can communicate with other people who only can speak english, they can understand me what I say. But when it comes

to writing, I found many people could not understand me. Although what you said was right, I am still concerned about it.

Now I am a little afraid of giving my comments on other people's essaies. I don't want to mislead them.

I don't know how to score it, but I can tell you that you are not yet ready to earn a perfect score. You have to practice by typing articles and reading them aloud. For example, go to a wikipedia page that interests you, and read each sentence. Speak it aloud. Type it. Practice slowly for 30 minutes every day. You have to type AND speak the words aloud. It's the only way!

Look at this kind of mistake:

So, these this issue causes...

or

So, these issues cause...