In last 20 century the population city increases dramatically

migration from rural to urban areas

In the last twentieth century, the proportion of the world's population living in cities has increased substantially. People have moved in ever growing numbers to urban areas. As immigration from rural areas to cities continues, it is inevitable that the infrastructure in these cities will collapse. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

After end of previous century until now, people are motivated to live in the cities. This treatment of people has some problems for these cities, such as shortage of basic facilities for new arrivers. This essay tries to discuss about my agreement about this topic and express my opinion.

In the first, by growing suddenly the population of people in one city, the infrastructure such as water, gas, sewerage, electricity cannot increase as the same rate as the grows of the population. So, outskirts will be appeared with low level of basic facilities. As we can see these days, around many big cities, a lot of areas are occupied by poor without any fundamental facilities.

Also, these people need education and job, it should be provided more schools, universities, companies by municipal, which makes long time and process to produce the facilities for whole of people. Because education needs to hire teachers, professors and researchers and provide budget to support them.

In addition, many big cities has to provide huge amount of budget for building new park, cinema and shopping centers, which cannot be available in the short period of time and managing the structure of city for extra population needs deep knowledge and design.

In the summary, whole of my explanation shows that growing fast population of cities makes them creditably challenge to provide facilities as the same rate. The water, sewerage, electricity should be extend to avoid to face poor area around cities. Also, education cannot be easily provided for whole of people. In the end, design of more area for entertainment needs long time.

Thanks a lot if you give me the total score of IELTS for this writing.

Sorry, no scoring unless you avail of our private review services. Students who score your essay will find their accounts immediately suspended. However, you will be able to figure out the type of score you will be getting based on the overall review of your essay that I will be providing.

You need to build your English vocabulary and also, your understanding of the meaning of English words. Your English word usage is obviously ESL beginner, which is the worst kind of English speaker as they normally cannot form clearly presented, coherent sentences. That is the main problem with your presentation. You also did not respond properly to the question provided which is "To what extent" instead, you only agree, without a degree of measurement such as "I strongly agree / disagree". Your thesis presentation is incomplete as you do not clue in the examiner on the reason behind your opinion. For example, you could have said: " I based this opinion on the publicly known information that..."

This is only a 4 paragraph essay because it is not a comparative plus personal opinion essay. While you will not be losing any points for writing 5 paragraphs, writing 5 problematic paragraphs only creates more errors on your part that, in this case, further led to the failing score of this essay.