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What did I learn at Oriental Institute? - essay


BBgirl 12 / 3  
Jan 30, 2008   #1
thank you for helping me, i extended my essay because it was called 3 full pages essay, could you check it ?

What did I learn at the Oriental Institute Museum?

I have only been to a museum once since I was child. I had almost forgotten what museum is. I saw the Oriental Institute Museum the first time in America with my friend. I was really excited to see the fascinating sights at the museum. There were a lot of wonderful, incredible, and beautiful exhibits. My friend and I learned a lot of things while we were there.

The museum shows the history, art, and archeology of the ancient Near East. You can gain knowledge about ancient people, such as how did ancient people originate, how did they develop, what tools did they use, and what did they do. Unbelievably enough, many ancient people had already invented some of our modern items; they invented the first coins and written script, they built houses, and played games.

Ancient civilizations developed step by step. You can see the structure of the first village at the museum. As they started to live in settlements they needed a leader who could maintain control; therefore, ancient empires originated. There were many ancient empires which had their own customs, rules, and territories. The museum galleries are divided into different empires. There are Mesopotamian, Assyrian, Egyptian, Persian, Nubian, Megiddo and Syro-Anatolian galleries. Each of them has their own distinctiveness. I want to mention some of the exhibits that interested me the most.

They did not have paper and pen, but they could write. I was surprised to learn about writing in ancient Mesotopotamia. Their scribes wrote in cuneiform script for more than 3000 years. And there were the some script of cuneiform.

They wrote scripts on wax, clay, and stone. They could organize the complicated world around them. There was a board which named development of cuneiform, and there were some words when used in ca 3200 B.C- 600 B.C with explaining. It was funny when my friend and I read it. For instance, if you want to say "eat a food" or "drink water" in that past, you would be said "ku ninda", or "ku a". What's more, there was the code of Hammurabi. The tall stela is inscribed with their 300 laws. The laws, written in cuneiform, are carved in short vertical columns arranged in horizontal rows. The stela of Hammurabi is a collection of legal verdicts that were probably ratified by Hammurabi during his forty years of rule.

Ancient people described their life, rules and gods on stone. You can see many of them in the Assyrian and Anatolian galleries. Those galleries also contain artifacts connected with the beginning of two important eras, the Bronze Age and the later Iron Age. The Assyrians were the first to use iron extensively in weapons, and ingots from the birth of the Iron Age (about 900 B.C.). And they had some objects of bronze such as tools, weapons and figurines.

When I saw some showcases in different empires, most objects were a similar. It might be that they had interacted and adopted each other's styles.

Most of the museum's showcases have interesting sculptures made of stone and wood. They all have their own history and meanings. Example, models of workshops where located in Egyptian gallery was placed in tombs, because it was believed that the tiny figures in the model could provide for the deceased in the afterlife. In the tomb model, workers are preparing all the bread, beef, and beer needed for eternity.

During my tour of the museum I was scared by the mummies and carcasses in the Egyptian gallery. I've never seen a mummy or a carcass before. It was fascinating. And many animals lived in ancient Egypt, so there were many pictures and statues of animals such as lion, baboon, and hippo. Have you ever think about how ancient children did play? Egyptian children sometimes played with wooden toys shaped like the animals that lived nearby in the Nile River, such as hippos and crocodiles. These toys often had hinges that allowed the mouths to move up and down. They also enjoyed physical sports, such as juggling and playing board games at home.

Another interesting thing was that I saw a cosmetics container and many beautiful pieces of jewelry. They created cosmetic containers in the Iron Age (900-550 BC). It makes me feel that women could take care of their beauty even in ancient times. I like that, and am proud of it.

I've been advising my friends to visit the museum. I hope they, too, will like it. And I'm thankful to my teacher who told us to go see it. I efficiently spent my time well with my friend.

EF_Team2 1 / 1,709  
Mar 19, 2008   #2
Greetings!

Your essay is filling out very well! Here are some suggestions:

I had almost forgotten what a museum is.

And there were the some script of cuneiform. - I'm not sure what you were trying to say here; perhaps "And there were some cuneiform scripts, as well"?

There was a board which showed the development of cuneiform, and there were some words that were used in ca 3200 B.C- 600 B.C with explanations of their meaning.

For instance, if you want to say "eat food" or "drink water" in that ancient language, you would say "ku ninda", or "ku a".

When I saw some showcases in different empires, many objects were similar.

For example, models of workshops where located in Egyptian gallery was placed in tombs, - this last part in bold does not really make sense.

Have you ever thought about how ancient children played?

Good work!

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com
OP BBgirl 12 / 3  
Mar 19, 2008   #3
tnk u so much, how is it ?

"For example, in Egyptian showcase, models of workshops were placed in tombs, because it was believed that the tiny figures in the model could provide for the deceased in the afterlife."
EF_Team2 1 / 1,709  
Mar 20, 2008   #4
Greetings!

That's very good! Just remember that, most of the time, nouns in English will require an article (a, an or the). So, make it say "For example, in the Egyptian showcase, models of workshops were placed in tombs, because it was believed that the tiny figures in the model could provide for the deceased in the afterlife."

Keep up the good work!

Thanks,

Sarah, EssayForum.com


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