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IELTS line graph - task 1 - thefts per thousand vehicles in four countries between 1990 and 1999.

juhuihjijuh 3 / 8  
Jan 14, 2020   #1
Hello everyone, I will be really happy by telling me your feedback about my writing task one.

comparison of car theft

The line graph illustrates car thefts in the UK, Sweden, France and Canada from 1990 to 1999. Over all, despite some fluctuations, car theft almost remained the same in Great Britain, France and Canada. While the rate in Sweden rose during the period given.

In 1990, the rate of stealing cars in France and Canada were about 6 and 7 subsequently. Then they both experienced some ups and downs to be stable at nearly the same amount at the end of the period. In addition to that, car theft in the UK was almost 18 in 1990, then the rate underwent some fluctuations that made a slight change to become about 17 in 1999.

On the other hand, the number of stolen cars in Sweden was about 8 in 1990 and then it showed a steady rise to 1996. From 1996 it remained the same until 1998 which followed by another a gradual growth to be to hit nearly 14 at the end of the period.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,976 4812  
Jan 15, 2020   #2
The summary with trending statement is well developed. The comparisons are also well developed and presented within the essay. One thing I noticed was that you decided not to mention any figure for the steady rise in 1996 for Sweden. In such instances, when no specific figure is given, you can give an estimation instead. You have to make sure that you refer to some sort of figure as the report summary relies on the accuracy of your presentation. Always try to write a minimum of 3 sentences per paragraph so that you can increase your LR and GRA scoring considerations. Grammar mistakes include your misrepresentation of the word "overall" as "over all". You also failed to use the Oxford comma when listing the countries listed in the graph.
Rwannajjar 2 / 4  
Jan 18, 2020   #3
It is a very good essay but as Holt mentioned:
Over all= overall
Great Britain, France and Canada = Great Britain, France, and Canada

Good luck :)
trvaanh 10 / 20  
Jan 20, 2020   #4
I think at this point From 1996 it remained the same , you should add the figure. At which it remained the same? Approximately 12.

Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS line graph - task 1 - thefts per thousand vehicles in four countries between 1990 and 1999.
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