Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


'living in a house better than in an apartment' - IELTS General Writing 2



Thelma 1 / 2  
Aug 2, 2012   #1
Some people prefer to live in a house, while there are more advantage to live in an apartment .
Are there more advantage than disadvantage of living in a house compared with living in an apartment?

Yes,there are more advantages living in a house than in an apartment.

My first point is people like to have there privacy. As a example some people like to listen loud music,in an apartment they can't listen music as they wish.

Other things is people found difficulty to hang their clothes because an apartment spaces are limited or some time they have to shear space with neighbors.

People can't make their privacy party.

My second point is there is always a garden space in house than an apartment. some people wish to plant and they like to set in a garden and chat with their family members.

also their children have more space to play.

Other point is in a house there is driving parking yard in the house, also they can park more than one vehicle in their yard.

My next point is most people like to have a pet. Living in house they will be free to have pets. In an apartment very difficult to have pets.

Living in a house building expansion possibilities are there. People can build additional room, Bath room or can expansion living room or kitchen as they wish or they can rebuild.

Living in an apartment people can't expansion.

My last point is living in an apartment most of the time uneasy to living access elder people or sick people difficult to claim the staircases. Also difficult to move new furniture and other item.

Finally my opinion is living in a house more advantage than living in an apartment.

ah_zafari [Contributor] 40 / 661  
Aug 3, 2012   #2
Yes,there are more advantages living in a house than in an apartment.

U should improve your information about organization and structure of an essay. What I quoted above cannot be considered as an introduction. Open the essay with a motivator. Then reword the topic as the thesis statement of the essay, and finally write a blueprint.

The topic is "advantages and disadvantages" type. So, allocate one paragraph to advantages of an apartment or a house and another one to disadvantages. At the third paragraph of the body compare the positive and negative aspects of living in an apartment and a house. In this paragraph u should also give your opinion.

Conclusion: Restate the thesis statement and write a clincher.

In order to write a good essay you should organize your ideas in an appropriate way.

Regards
Ahmad
OP Thelma 1 / 2  
Aug 3, 2012   #3
I see the point you are making,will Adapt to advice hope to correct my self on next test.

thanking you and hoping to write soon.

Regards
Thelma


Home / Writing Feedback / 'living in a house better than in an apartment' - IELTS General Writing 2
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳