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The maps depict an industrial place in Norbiton town at the present and after the development


Dumboi 1 / -  
May 24, 2023   #1

industrial area map in the town of Norbiton



The maps depict an industrial place in Norbiton town at the present and the future itself.
Looking at the maps, there will be a lot of changes in the future development of the area. The extension in paths and the replacement of factory.

A path will be formed to the north of the roundabout and cut through the river above the map. Moreover, housing will be built at the end of the the path. A playground together with a school, according to the plan, are going to be located near the river and to the East of the center of the map. A medical centre is going to be constructed below and to the South-East of the roundabout.

Following the changes, a shop with a path are built to the West of the circle. A small roundabout will also appear below the bigger one in the future days. Last but not least, the replacing all factory into housing area is the most noticeable in the maps.



Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,801 4780  
May 25, 2023   #2
Your use of simple English is one of the strengths of this essay. You have shown an actual ability to explain yourself using conversational simple English words. As such, your coherence will receive a good score. The most basic problem of this essay though is that you are not using the correct 4 paragraph format. The 4 paragraph presentation is used when there are 2 images involved in the presentation. The 3 body paragraphs are used to explain the individual changes, then the comparison of changes in the analysis. Regardless, you will receive a score for this presentation.

The extension in paths and the replacement of factory.

These are the subjects of the sentence, but there are no indicators as to what these refer to. The sentence is just hanging there, without a meaning. This will definitely result in a negative GRA score.


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