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"Mazes, Jigsaw puzzles.." - is this type of essay usable?



cornonthecobb 2 / 3  
Sep 3, 2011   #1
I'm currently sifting through ideas for a potential college essay.. and I'm a bit stuck. This one is not nearly complete, but I would like some feedback on it regardless. Should I make my essay more of a story of sorts, or is this type of essay usable? Thanks in advance.

Jigsaw puzzles are terribly mundane. The box mandates that I create the image emblazoned on he cover; I refuse to do so. The finished product of a jigsaw puzzle is not a surprise, and is entirely devoid of excitement. The box stifles my creativity, and although I attempt to create something different than the image on the box, the pieces tend to prefer their predetermined positions. Plus, it inevitably looks horrific.

Mazes are slightly more interesting, though not to the degree I would like. I prefer a maze comprised of moving walls, shifting passages... one that will put up a fight and refuse to end until a figure of higher authority demands it to rest. I have only come across one such puzzle. My only complaint is that I occasionally need to apply sunscreen before diving into it.

There are innumerable ways to reach the end of this labyrinth, with each plausible pathway rife with dead ends. There is no one path to the goal, no "right" way to solve the puzzle. A balance must be stricken and maintained between brute force and beauty for a solution to be achieved. Unfortunately, my own sense of force and beauty cannot be imposed upon the maze, as the maze does not tend to see eye-to-eye with any individual. A group must coerce it, but this task is made no easier by the fact that there is always another crowd trying to force the flow in the opposite direction.

This turns the puzzle into a match, a competition, a war of negotiation with the highly uncooperative shifting walls. The negotiation tactics employed by my father as a marketing executive are of no use here, though. Unlike some walls I have come across over the years, these do not have ears. Or if they do, they are not very good listeners.

(I know I need to add more and edit it several times)

niclarson 1 / 10  
Sep 3, 2011   #2
It's a very creative start!! I like the idea and can see your voice through the piece, but for it to be a successful college essay you need to relate it back to yourself more. what does the fact that you like mazes more than puzzles reveal about you? is there a story you could relate this to? maybe that you like less restrained activities better than those with strict rules & no room for creativity?

I have only come across one such puzzle. My only complaint is that I occasionally need to apply sunscreen before diving into it.
^these sentences seem to be conveying something rather profound, but is there a way you could more clearly portray what you're trying to say?


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