Task：
The best way for the government to solve traffic congestion is to provide free public transport 24 hours a day and 7 days a week.
Do you agree or disagree?
(Note: i realized i have written too long for this essay, but since i just start practicing, i hope i could keep the first version of my work as a reference for my further study of writing. )
Nowadays, more and more cities, especially big cities are facing traffic congestion problems very badly. In order to ease such issues, some people proposed to provide free public transportation all the time. It seems like a good way to solve this problem, but from my point of view, only temporally.
People who regard free public transport as the solution to traffic congestion are taking the transport cost and traffic condition as a cause and effect relationship incorrectly. They think with a higher public transportation price, people tend to drive their own cars, thus causing the street to become more and more crowded. If there is no cost when taking public transportation, people will convert to commute by bus or metro.
The bigger holes of the inference above is that the cost of driving a private car is higher than that of public transportation sometimes, considering gas expenses, car insurance, parking fee, and etc. People who are used to driving a car to commute won't choose to take a bus instead suddenly only if the bus is free.
In fact, public transport does help to release traffic congestion pressure to some extent, but not in the way of how much it takes, but the public transport environment as well as its service.
Firstly, we should be more aware of why people are willing to pay more to drive their car than save money by taking a bus. Private car is cleaner, though it costs more than public transport. Meanwhile, driving their own car could avoid crowded people especially during peak hours. For example, Japan's railways, also known as Shinkansen, are one of the main ways for people to commute. Every weekday morning, thousands of people enter the cabin and stand like the Sardine in a can. If one person among them has the ability to afford a private car, he or she would definitely not take the railway to go to the office anymore.
Secondly, a reasonable route design and interval will attract more people to take public transport. One of the best services of metro is Hong Kong MTR, which is famous for its on-time approach and departure. MTR provides a massive schedule during the peak hour, so that it could even only take half or one minute to get on the next train if you miss the last train. Besides, MTR's coverage is wide and well-designed that no matter where you live, you could reach your destination within one hour.
All in all, I don't agree to provide free public transport only for solving traffic congestion. Improving public transpor's environment and service is the key to this problem.
(440 words)
The biggest problem in your essay, I think, is organization.
Your supporting ideas and examples are not organized at all. You should have one paragraph for reason number 1, then give an example if you wish, then one paragraph for reason number 2, then an example.
You may have 3 body paragraphs if you want (recommended only two) but should never write more than that.
