Unanswered [2]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 3


The Oversea Vietnamese Youth camp



Thanh Huyen 1 / 1  
Apr 10, 2012   #1
hello everybody, please help me correct grammar error and fragment of sentence in my essay

As usual, The Ho Chi Minh city (HCM) Oversea Vietnamese Committee along with HCM Communist Youth Union organize The Oversea Vietnamese Youth camp (from 17/7/2012 to 20/7/2012) for Oversea Vietnamese youth from 15 to 30 years old. In order to taking part in this summer camp, every member will pay 1,2 million Vietnam dong as camp participant. Attending camp, we could meet Vietnamese coming back from all over the world and have experience the true Vietnamese culture which we couldn't find out in another place, except for living here.

The first day: Trying working as a farmer in Cu Chi District, a famous place of the legendary Cu Chi Tunnels where Vietnamese guerrillas hid during the Vietnam War.

The Youth generation being born after the country liberated is difficult to image secret cellar where their grandparents consider as the shelter in war time. In which people had suddenly been death by failed bullet as mush as the rain in jungle. Now a day, the cellar is not exist in life of Vietnamese any more, Cu Chi tunnel turn into symbol of heroic spirit of Vietnamese in antiwar with foreign invader. For this reason, Cuchi tunnel becaome one of ten sight-seeing sites are the Ho Chi Minh attracting a lot of tourist.

People in Cuchi distrist often say proudly: My home distrist was not lagre but enemy hardy invaded because Cu Chi people are heroic and genious such as Vietnam territory is small but Vietnamese spirit is rather than die than surrender to the invader.

Traditional history is always a great pride in all of us. Coming back to national culture, all of camper could intergrate into the lives of people here with such some activities as drawing water and catching fishes v.v... After that it comes time for us to enjoy our achievement with grilled fishes after working as farmer.

The next two days: Madagui- the wild forest of the central highland

Being far from Ho Chi Minh city about 150 km, the Madagui Forest in Lam Dong province is renowned for its natural beauty and intricate system of springs and streams. Besides, it has also become a popular place with rugged scenery, caves and diversity of flora. It is the forest that brings us to relax or enjoy camp.

There is nothing to be more interesting than staying in a green mountain range and listening birdsong, murmuring waves in sultry summer. Especially, fire camp night help us have more time to understand each other and to tighten friendship. At that time, we will have opportunity to learn more about the hidden charming of dance of the Highlands.

The last day:

The last day of summer camp, we return to Ho Chi Minh city to prepare the closing ceremony.

dumi 1 / 6793  
Apr 11, 2012   #2
As usual, The Ho Chi Minh city (HCM) Oversea Vietnamese Committee along with HCM Communist Youth Union organize The Oversea Vietnamese Youth camp (from 17/7/2012 to 20/7/2012) for Oversea Vietnamese youth from 15 to 30 years old. ---------- I suggest the following;

The Ho Chi Minh city (HCM) Oversea Vietnamese Committee together with HCM Communist Youth Union are in the process of organizing the Overseas Vietnamese Youth Camp 2012 at xxxxxxx( mention the venue ). This event is scheduled to be held from 17th to 20th July 2012 for the Vietnamese youth who live overseas and aged between 15 to 30 years, at a participation fee of 1.2 million Vietnamese Dong per participant. This summer camp would offer valuable networking opportunities to the overseas Vietnamese youth together with a great exposure to the true Vietnamese culture which would be a very unique experience that they recieve only in Vietnam.
OP Thanh Huyen 1 / 1  
Apr 12, 2012   #3
Thank you so much, De Silva


Home / Writing Feedback / The Oversea Vietnamese Youth camp
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳