Unanswered [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


IELTS TASK : Passenger railway journeys made in Great Britain between 1950 and 2004/5.



dina79 20 / 25  
Apr 10, 2016   #1
The graph below shows the number of passenger railway journeys made in Great Britain between 1950 and 2004/5.

The line graph illustrates about the majority of people travels with the railways in UK from 1950 to 2004/5 and counted by millions. The National network was a rank first as the favourite transportation. While the London Underground in the second choice for the people.

The National network had the top position in the similar pattern when it comes in 1958 and 2004/5 at 1,100. However, the London Underground reach the high value as the second choice at 900. It was the National rail network decrease since 1958 until 1983 to 600 and followed by London Underground had the lowest user at 500 in 1983.

On the other hand, the figure London Underground had the enhanced user such as 170 in the 2004/05. In which the National rail network change the improve customer around 100. It is since the rail network more populer in the human since 1950 and London Underground exist also more likely in the end year 2004/05.


  • 1.2..JPG


aviniwirastri 10 / 35  
Apr 10, 2016   #2
The National network was a rank first as the favourite transportation
the first rank

While the London Underground in the second choice for the people
there is no verb.

when it comes in 1958 and 2004/5 at 1,100
simple past is needed. when it came...

However, the London Underground reached the high value as the second choice at 900

the figure London Underground had the enhanced user such as 170 in the 2004/05
improving / rising

the last paragraph : it is better to use simple past.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS TASK : Passenger railway journeys made in Great Britain between 1950 and 2004/5.
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳