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The peak of malarial death was a bit over 5 million in 1930.



misskitty22 2 / 2  
Oct 31, 2016   #1
Mosquitoes, Malaria, and Education - Bill Gates

In 1960, there were high rates of death children before the age of five because of some diseases such as diarrhea, pneumonia, and malaria. In the year of 1990 there were a half cut down of childhood death rates because of some changes in community from the rising of income and the use of vaccines. The peak of malarial death was a bit over 5 million in 1930. This disease became more gigantic in not only poor countries but also rich countries such America and European country. The knowledge and innovation has been created to decrease malaria for example the use of DDT or even the use of net to banish the mosquitoes. Developed countries got rid of this disease faster than some countries around the equator with majority are poor country. To get rid from malaria we need many elements in order to eradicate malaria such as communication, scientist, government, etc.

Education also huge problems in this world where some place are still experiencing low education system. People who do not have good education will lead to difficulties in getting a job. Low income people also tend to enter the jail. We have to change the way people believe and make more people equal in getting a job and having an equal salary. Great education is one of the solutions that need to spread all over the place to people. To make an education better can be done by having a great teacher.

Hujjatul19 45 / 64  
Nov 1, 2016   #2
Dear misskitty, you have a good summary, however I have some advice for you

It is essential to attach the source of the article. (This summary is brought from (the link)

In the year of 1990 (...) childhood death rates because of some changes in community from the rising of income and the use of vaccines .
Word "from"is always followed by "to"

Instead of saying because of some changes in community from the rising of income and the use of vaccines , you may say since some changes is faced such as the rising income and the use of vaccines.

The peak of malarial death wasis a bit over ...
This disease becamebecomes more gigantic in

since it is a fact, you should state it in present tense

Keep writing. Best Regards.


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