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IELTS:Some people believe that there should be fixed punishment for each crime type



talwinder 2 / 5  
Jul 24, 2013   #1
Topic: Some people believe that there should be fixed punishments for each type of crime.Others,however,argue that the circumstances of an individual crime,and the motivation for committing it,should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment.

Generally reason behind punishment is to reduce the crime from a nation and to build a fear in the mind of offenders. Some people think that it does not matter what is reason behind committing a crime therefore there should be fixed punishment for a specific crime. Alternatively I believe that it should taken into consideration the situation and conditions, that forces to a person to be a criminal.

First of all if there will be a fixed punishment for each type of crime then it will lead to increase the crime because the punishment will be clear in the mind of professional criminals and they will not feel fear while committing a crime. Secondly, laws and rules are there for people therefore it is necessary to have a look behind crime for instance "a women steals feed for her child should be treated same as a women, who steals for her drug addiction". The person who committed crime first time and the professional criminals should not be imprisoned at same place.

On the contrary, fixed punishment will reduce the time taken by judges to give their judgement and it will be effective economically for the Government. Everyone should be treated equally because sometimes we see that a poor person who do not have much money for hiring a good lawyer they get imprisoned even without committing a crime and when they come back to the society they become a professional criminal. Therefore fixed punishment will reduce the space between poor and rich people and everyone will understand the importance of each other.

To conclude, Government should decide for punishment case by case basis. In doing so crime can be eliminated from a nation and it is a responsibility of every individual to be in the favor of truth and respect the laws of our constitution.

brtsnck 3 / 7  
Jul 24, 2013   #2
You should be carefull against punctuation error.
gmad06 20 / 143  
Jul 24, 2013   #3
You must place a comma on each cohesive words to emphasize a smooth quick stop to your reader.

dont capitalize the word "government",it isn't a proper noun
dumi 1 / 6795  
Jul 25, 2013   #4
Generally reason behind punishment is to reduce the crime from a nation and to build a fear in the mind of offenders

...this is not a general reason, but it is the main objective. Use the most appropriate words when you are expressing ideas.

Some people think that it does not matter what is reason behind committing a crime therefore there should be fixed punishment for a specific crime.

Some people think it really does not matter what the reason behind the crime
Wel, I dont find this a very logical explaination.
Post this type of essays into Writing Feedback forum.
Pahan 1 / 1824  
Aug 16, 2013   #5
Generally reason behind punishment is to reduce the crime from a nation and to build a fear in the mind of offenders

Generally, the objective of punishment is to arrest the level of crimes in a society .
Some people think that it does not matter what is the reason behind committing a crime therefore thereshould be fixed punishment for a specific crime.
Arun0506 27 / 119  
Aug 16, 2013   #6
Hi Talwinder,
I feel that the first two paragraphs look similar and it better to make it one .
Try to use synonyms. For example instead of using crime again and again you use mistake, creating problems to public, misconduct, wrongdoing, offense etc..

Thanks.


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