Unanswered [1] / Urgent [0] / SERVICES
 DrAfT!
Home / Writing Feedback   3

People who live in the world and the areas


The graphs show the data about the people who live in the world and also the people who live in the areas. Overall, the number of world population developed from 1800 to 2050 before was predicted to decrease in 2100. The citizen who live in the developing areas had an increase number of the population.

Nevertheless, the citizen who live in the developed areas has an unchanging number of the population.
In 1800, the number of the world population were 1000 million people, and the number were gradually grown approximately 3000 million of the people in 1960, and it increased dramatically at 8000 in 2040. It was projected to decline enormously to 6000 in 2100.

In contrast, the number of the citizen who lived in the developed areas was above 1000 million of the people in 2015 which has an unchanging number of the population until 2040. While, the citizen who lived in developing areas had an increase number of the population above 2000 in 2015. The number of citizen in developing areas will increase dramatically to 4000 in 2040.




@ayrahumairah
Hallo Ms. Ayra
Good Evenings......
I will try to correct your writing. I am not really good in a writing actually, so I hope we can discuss.

In the introdoction you write :
The graphs show the data about the people who live in the world and also the people who live in the areas.,
In this introduction, I think you not clearly describe information about graph, whereas it is important before you continue to overview. Maybe, you can change to : The graphs show the data about the people who live in theglobal world and also the people who live in the areas.

In the body your write :
Nevertheless, the citizen who live ...

I think, you dont need to use the enter button. You can delete the enter.

In the body at the second line you write:
In 1800, the number of the world population ...

Please You write adverb after verb and You must be careful about spelling. Spelling is important, because if You not write one alphabets maybe You can lose the meaning.

You can change :
In 1800, the number of the global world population stood at 1000 millionspeople, and grown gradually arround 3000 millions of the people in 1960,

Above, I changes some world to be effectively and clearly sentences, such as :
the number of the world population were 1000 million people became, the number of the global world population stood at 1000
gradually grown approximately 3000 million of the people in 1960 became grown gradually arround 3000 millions of the people in 1960,


Home / Writing Feedback / People who live in the world and the areas