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'it is not permanent'; enjoy your money when you earn or save for your future



Jaanu 3 / 5  
Mar 9, 2014   #1
Every person in the world needs to earn. It is very important for their life. When they earn, the person can enjoy with their money or save their money for some time in the future. According to my opinion, it is better to save our money for our future.

Firstly, a person needs to face different kind of expenses. It might be an expected expenses such as education of their children, marriage purpose etc. For example, in our society when a girl wants to marry, their parents need to give dowry to the boy. It would vary depend on the places. Therefore, the girl's parents need to save money for their daughter's life. Moreover, nowadays the education system has become very modern and very expensive. Anyone can't arrange that much of high amount of money immediately.

Additionally, sometimes people face many unexpected expenses such as medical purpose. For example, nowadays most people effect by different type of diseases such as cancer, brain humor, kidney failure etc. People never expect that it would affect them or their family members. However, they need to get treatment. But, it costs high.

On the other hand, when people's younger period of their life, most of them like to enjoy with their earning money. Besides, they feel that they have just come out from their parents' grip, they are totally independent. They enjoy their life with his friends. Additionally, they go to restaurant , have fun and celebrate parties. Further, they visit to cinema and go around the country. Definitely, it is happy life. They don't need to worry about any things. However, it is not permanent. When they need to settle to their family life, they face many difficulties without money in hand.

Finally, when people are in his younger age, they would be physically fit. It allows them to work hard than the latter period of their life. Addition to that, they can earn lot of money and save for their future expenses. It would create a wealthy and prosperous life of a person.

eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1170  
Apr 5, 2014   #2
etc

etc.

Using etc indicates that you do not have any serious to complete your ideas. I suggest you to finish your sentences. Or end it with full stop, instead of etc

It would create a wealthy and prosperous life of a person.

Besides, they feel that they have just come out from their parents' grip, they are totally independent.

This is called comma splice, occuring when you use a comma to join two complete sentences without placing an appropriate joining word between them.

Well, if you have a question that you don't like at all, then you can write with a 5-paragraph essay. You write one introduction, three bodies, and one conclusion. In the bodies, you will argue more on one side than the other by writing two content paragraphs arguing for and one against. This can help you write more words, but some seems inefficient, by writing too many words.

With a 4-paragraph essay, you are easy to develop your paragraph properly, one content paragraph for, and one against. This is good for coherence and cohesion between sentence to sentence and paragraph to paragraph, and for which in the five-paragraph structure this is weak.


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