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IELTS Essay (Task 2): Positive & Negative Effects of IT



ilmanovski 1 / -  
Jul 1, 2020   #1
Hi, everyone! I recently joined this forum as I planned to take IELTS test at the end of this month.
I have written an IELTS essay and I would appreciate any comment. Thank you in advance.

Evaluation of information technology effects



Q: In the last 20 years there have been significant developments in the field of information technology (IT), for example the World Wide Web and communication by email. However, these developments in IT are likely to have more negative effects than positive in the future. To what extent do you agree with this view?

Information technology (IT) is arguably one of the fields that has seen the biggest change in the last two decades. It would meet much bigger change as it is predicted that the recent technology of IT has shown that Artificial Intelligence (AI), technology that enables a machine to function like a human being, and automation, technology that makes things work automatically with very little input from people that use them, are ready to be put for use in a year or two. While both future technologies would offer great advantages to society, they are also predicted to have more drawbacks. This essay will explore both the positive effects and negative effects of the future IT development, specifically with the implementation of AI and Automation.

With the use of AI and automation, IT would bring more benefits to society, not only on everyday life but also on business. Firstly, it would simplify the way people live. With these technologies ahead of us, we can expect automated self-driving cars where the drivers only need to tell them where to go and then relax. Next, it would provide effective and efficient solutions to corporations. For example, every company can aim to be high-performance by employing cheaper-than-human robots being programmed based on their best employees.

However, the implementation of AI and automation also has negative impacts in the future. Examples being mentioned in the previous paragraph, self-driving cars and robot installation, have their own drawbacks in return. Technologies like cars being able to drive itself would make people lazy and dependent. As a result, they would create a society who needs constant help for everything. Also, the use of robots in workplace would likely eliminate jobs for humans in the future. If robots are proven to be cheaper and more productive than humans, there will be no reason to hire any more human workers in workplace.

In conclusion, the future IT with the implementation of AI & automation would be beneficial to society, both on everyday life and on work-related stuff. However, it would also bring downsides in return.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15342  
Jul 2, 2020   #2
You changed the prompt discussion instruction so this essay clearly does not meet the prompt discussion requirements. As you can see from the outline below, your mistake in understanding the discussion reason and discussion instruction is what created this problem.

Discussion Topic: In the last 20 years there have been significant developments in the field of information technology (IT)
Discussion Reason: these developments in IT are likely to have more negative effects than positive in the future
Discussion Instruction: To what extent do you agree with this view?

Your version was:
Discussion Topic: Information technology (IT) is arguably one of the fields that has seen the biggest change in the last two decades.
Discussion Reason: While both future technologies would offer great advantages to society, they are also predicted to have more drawbacks.
Question Response: This essay will explore both the positive effects and negative effects of the future IT development, specifically with the implementation of AI and Automation.

Your essay focuses on the wrong aspect of the discussion. AI is not the focus, the focus is on the rising negative effects of IT in the future. The response was to have to explain the extent of your agreement with the point of view. Funny, I believe that the instruction is for you to show your extent of agreement or disagreement, whatever. Regardless, your response is totally wring. Your discussion slant is incorrect. It does not follow the provided instructions and discussion topic focus. This is not an essay that will get a passing score.


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