The private car is the most popular vehicle in Edmonton used for commuting to work, business, etc.

Ielts writing taks 1_Edmonton car use

The pie graph compares the popularity between 4 major means of transport in Edmonton, while the data given in the table illustrate the reasons why the city residents use automobiles.

Overall, what stands out from the graph is that private car is the most popular vehicle which is used mainly for travelling to work, business, and taking children to school.

As can be seen, top op the list is private car, which represents for nearly half of transport in Edmonton. LRT comes next with over a third of the city population using it. Bus and taxi are the least popular mode of transport, at 10% for each one.

Looking at the details, A majority of car owners said they use it for transport between home and workplace, as well as business purposes, at 55% and 45% respectively. Another large percentage of parents taking the kids to school by car, at 40%. Shopping accounts for 15%, and leisure activities, at the same rate, are the two lowest recorded figures

• 
  Edmonton_car_use.png
  

Hi @windvalley

I liked how the way you presented the data. It is organized and well thought. However, there are some minor points I want to say.

Overall,what stands out from the graph is thatprivate car is the most popular vehicle which is used mainly for travelling to work, business, and taking children to school. This sentence is kinda wordy. There are some phrases that you can remove instead.

As can be seen, topopthe list is private car, I don't know if you mean is "of " but whichever it is, you can simply say As can be seen, Private Car, which tops the list, represents nearly half of the transport in Edmonton.

... mode of transportwhich is at 10%. for each one.

Looking at the details, A majority

they useitcarfor transport If there will be no illustration given to the readers, they might get confused what does your "it" is referring to. So, specify first what do you want to talk about then, after that, you can use it. At least they knew what is that "it" refers to.

Shoppingaccounts for 15%,and leisure activities, at the same rate, are the two lowest recorded figures.
I think there is a problem in this sentence which I can not point out. But, here are my suggestions that you can use instead of that sentence.

Shopping and leisure activities are tied at ...
Shopping and leisure activities are both at 15% making these two the least choice of car owners.

They both have the same number of words as what your first sentence has but it is more straight to the point.

There you go. Good luck and keep writing !