Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

Running on Faith

yinelson 1 / -  
Dec 30, 2012   #1
Here is my essay, I am appreciate any commend, Thanks.

Running on Faith
"Don't worry about it, have a little faith will you." It amazed me how calm and collected he was. He was the kind of guy who would always believe that things would work out somehow. I used to think that was silly, but now I could only wish to be as secure as he was.

Over my four years of high school, I've spent innumerous hours working in both Science Olympiad and FIRST Robotics. Through these two extracurriculars, I've meet some extraordinary people. Given the nature of those clubs, many of people there were absolute geniuses, but even among those geniuses, Bobby stood out to me. He wasn't perfect by any means; he was lazy, addicted to his cell phone, and a bit too much of a religious nut, but none of that really bothered me. Instead, the thing I'll always remember about him is how secure and confident he was.

During my first year on the robotics team, I signed up to be part of the programming sub team. We used a visual programming language called Labview to make our robot play a soccer like game. Back then I had no idea how to do anything, but somehow Bobby managed to teach me so that at least I'd be competent. Before long, I started working on the autonomous code for our robot, which told the robot to move without human input. The code I made was used during a match in a regional competition. I remember watching in horror as our robot began spinning wildly in circles, kicking a ball straight into the audience, and finally ramming into a wall at full speed. My first real contribution to the team had been a failure. Of course, that had shot my ego down. After that, I had to triple check everything and get someone else's approval before I was satisfied with any of my work. After about two weeks of this, Bobby came up to me and told me to "have a little faith" and not to worry about making mistakes. Maybe he said it because he was worried about me, or maybe it was because he was tired of checking my work. Regardless, I eventually came to see the world as he did. He taught me how important self confidence is, and more importantly, he taught me how important faith is.

Now people say I'm laid back. It's probably because I've adopted his idea of faith. Sure, it's absurdly optimistic way of living and some people may see it as unintelligible, but have no regrets about it. Anyone can tell you, life isn't easy. There will always be problems that you feel you can't handle. I guess when they happen, you just have to have faith that you'll pull through. As Eric Clapton once said, "Lately I've been running on faith. What else can a poor boy do?"

aarkebauer 5 / 14  
Dec 31, 2012   #2
Back then I had no idea how to do anything

You probably don't want to say it like this - try expanding this thought so it doesn't seem so blunt, because you probably did know how to do something.

You also might consider introducing Bobby a bit more - as it is, his entrance seems a little abrupt. Maybe talk about a kid named Bobby who was lazy, etc., but that stood out to you and go from there?

Home / Writing Feedback / Running on Faith