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Toefl essay- the same amount of money to students' sports activities as to libraries



RuthXue 2 / 1  
Feb 22, 2012   #1
Hey,everyone!
I'm gonna have my tofel test in April. Recently I'm working on my writing skills. I would like to hear anything about this essays. Thanks!!!


Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Universities should give the same amount of money to their students' sports activities as they give to their university libraries. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

- Some people claims that dedicating money to sports and social activities runs contrary to the universities' obligations that academic institutions should put more focus on libraries and classes. Even though they have a point there, I think this view is clearly short-sighted that academic achievement should not be developed at the expense of students' well-rounded development.

- So what's the good of sports and social activities for the university students?
- From a social perspective, only can people who are physically and mentally well-rounded contribute to the societal well-being while universities and colleges are, fundamentally, expected to cultivate such generation. In this way, encouraging students to be involved in various physical activities should be an indispensable part of universities responsibilities.

- From an academic viewpoint, promoting adequate sports and social activities is mutually beneficial for the academic achievement. These activities would inspire students' creativity and curiosity, so, not surprisingly , they would possibly perform better in academic research. In addition, through extra-curricular activities, students could learn fresh and stimulating thoughts and gain employable skills by putting theoretical knowledge into practice , which students can never learn from classes and libraries.

- As to the future development, sports and social activities would equip students with essential ingredients of being successful. Without doubt, there's no better way than sports to gain rugged willpower and tenacity. Also, social activities would sharpen students' intellect by coping with tricky problems and learn to be cooperative by group work. All these qualities will definitely lay a solid foundation for future success.

- Apparently, knowledge and skills can not be all acquired by students from universities and colleges' classes and libraries. Hence, allocating equal financial support for both aspects would offer students a wealth of benefits and render universities for much more outstanding students.

farina 11 / 20  
Feb 23, 2012   #2
RuthXue on the whole very well organised essay but you should also write one para about the opponents why they think universities should spend on libraries rather than sports

wellall -rounded development.

thanks
goku123 8 / 14  
Feb 24, 2012   #3
So what's the good of sports and social activities for the university students?

this sentence should be eliminated or combined with last paragraph because a paragraph can not only have one sentence.


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