Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 2


I disagree with the statement that getting a job that we love will make us happy



Fadhilahumar91 61 / 68  
Aug 21, 2016   #1
Some people say that in order to be happy, you must have a job you love doing. Others say that other factors are more important. Do you think that people can only be happy if they have a job they really enjoy?

All people in the world want to be happy. They do anything to get happiness such as getting much money, having a job that they love or having get married. In the present time, many inhabitants around the world think getting a job that their love will make her/his happy. In contrast, I disagree with their statements because many other factors influence the people's happiness.

Getting a job that people love is one factor to make enjoy, for example you can do all things that you enjoy, and it can develop yourself to get peak of career. You will never feel bored, high stress and under pressure when you work with your passion. However, working with passion does not guarantee, if people will be happy ever after. Those in the world get a job based on their passion, but they did not show their happiness. For example a person who has reached the highest career need therapist to help her/his in their problem such as depression, broken home, love and others. In contrast, people who did not get work that they love or those have normally life. They have been successful in family life, social interaction, religion and others. They live peacefully with their imperfect life.

In conclusion, happiness is not about getting a job that people love and those want. Happiness about how can people make a good deal with their fault, your heart, their ambition, their self and their imperfect life.

Wolf Larsen - / 109  
Aug 21, 2016   #2
Hello Fadhilahumar91

Your text could use being improved stylistically. The suggested adjustments are as follows:

They [...] would... to get attain... through becoming rich, getting married, or securing the job that they like.
In the present time [...] Nowadays, many inhabitants individuals... strive to experience the sensation of happiness by the mean of becoming professionally self-actualized.
In contrast, I disagree... [...] This sentence doesn't make any sense - you need to specify the statements that you disagree with.
Getting a job [...] Building a professional career can be definitely considered a pathway towards happiness.
high stress [...] highly stressed... while working with passion.
does not guarantee [...] one's continual happiness.
Those in the world [...] this sentence if redundant... you better remove it.
the highest [...] point in his or her career may well end up experiencing depression, which in turn will cause the concerned person to seek psychotherapy.

In contrast [...], many of those individuals who have failed at securing a well-paid job do seem to be rather happy with life.
happiness is not [...] about getting a highly desirable job.
Happiness is about [...] enjoying life, as it comes.

I hope this helped. regards.


Home / Writing Feedback / I disagree with the statement that getting a job that we love will make us happy
Do You Need
Academic Writing
or Editing Help?
Need professional help with your assignments? Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳