IELTS 1 - the statistics between marriages and divorces rate and marital status of adult Americans

Number of marriages and divorces in the USA

The two bar charts below illustrate the statistics between marriages and divorces rate and marital status of adult Americans ratio from 1970 to 2000.

Overall, the rate of marriages outweighs the divorces within that period of time. Meanwhile, it is crystal clear that the proportions of married Americans is stand at the greatest amount compare to the others' categories.

Having the exact figures, the total quantity of marriage reached the same level between 1970 and 1989,which is occupied 2.5 million. However, begins from 1990, the number tends to dwindle from approximately 2.4 million to 2 million until 2000. At the same time, the trend of divorces is upward from 1970 to 1980,which is from 1 million to roughly 1.4 million. Nevertheless, it decreased slightly from 1980 to 2000.

The second bar chart displays the ratio of marital status of adult Americans. Compared to the married Americans percentage, the others of marital status are strikingly less. It is exceedingly apparent that the least amount is located in 1970 of divorce rate,which is rarely reached 2%.

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@roswita116
Hello! Thanks for being consistent in the forum. I hope this feedback somehow helps you with your upcoming IELTS!

The first paragraph is decent. Because of how coherent and straightforward your writing is, it has made it a lot easier for the readers to digest the information. This is great.

Furthermore, I find that the usage of certain words can be unnecessary for other parts of the text. Consider, for example, the second paragraph. The second sentence appeared to be a little bit excessive - more than what how it should have been. Bear in mind that small mistakes such as this can crossover to the entirety of the text.