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student income over a ten year period ielts writing task 1



Soheila7814 1 / -  
Aug 20, 2012   #1
Hi. I need some feedback and advice on this writing for IELTS academic writing task 1. The graph has been attached. Thanks!

The table shows sources of students income over a ten year period in the United Kingdom.
During the period from 1988/89 to 1998/99, students income from students loan increased from 8% in 1988/89 to 24% in 1998/99 of total income. There was a 50% decrease in parental contribution which fell down from 32% in 1988/89 to 16% in 1998/99.

Student income from grant was constant between 1988/89 to 1992/93 at 38%. After that there was a decrease in grant which fell down to 23% in 1995/96 and went down again to 14% in 1998/99. During this period there was a growth in student earnings which went up from 6% 1988/89 and reached to a peak of 12% in 1998/99. Student income from other sources had some fluctuations. There was a 3% decrease from 1988/89 to 1992/93. Then it increased gradually from 27% in 1995/1996 to 34% in 1998/99.

Overall, with the exception of 1992/93, total student income per year increased from 4395 pounds in 1988/89 to 5575 pounds in 1998/99.


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EF_Susan - / 2310  
Aug 22, 2012   #2
There was a 50% decrease in parental contribution which fell down from 32% in 1988/89 to 16% in 1998/99.

Student income from grants were constant between 1988/89 to 1992/93 at 38%.

After that, there was a decrease in grants which fell down to 23% in 1995/96 and went down again to 14% in 1998/99.

During this period there was a growth in student earnings which went up from 6% 1988/89 and reached to a peak of 12% in 1998/99.

:)


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