Unanswered [1]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 4


Students should find the field they are interested in and contribute to it.



jemmy 2 / 3  
Jun 3, 2013   #1
Unpaid community services should be made compulsory in high school? Discuss!

Nowadays, an increasing number of people concerned about whether the unpaid community service should be a compulsory part in high school. some people think that student need to use their free time to do some volunteer works for local community. some people argue that students are still children who deserv entertainment. my view is that students are independent and have right to choose to do what they need.

Firstly, students are not qualified to do most of volunteer jobs. this is because they are rarely being trained for particular field. as a result, the job they did maybe a less-than desirable. for example, if a student who is trained for nothing to teach children how to play football. the children can be injured by without getting any information for how to protect themselves and prevent this kind of situation.

moreover, this is pointless if students are not forced to do something they do not want to do. the reason is that it can not give a sense of satisfaction and achievement for students if they are not motivated to do something. they maybe fill with negative attitude to the volunteer works, which result in a bad situation in both themselves and the works.

this is not to say it is always useless for student do any unpaid community service. they can make friends and develop different skills during this process. however, student are more likely to be happy and enthusiastic if student really love to do it.

in sum, student should find the field they are interested in and contribute to it.

NewUser 3 / 6  
Jun 4, 2013   #2
did

do / perform

if a student who is trained for nothing to teach children how to play football

if a student who is not trained is appointed to teach football to young kids, ...

they maybe fill with negative attitude to the volunteer works, which result in a bad situation in both themselves and the works.

As a result, they may get demotivated and develop negative attitude towards ...
OP jemmy 2 / 3  
Jun 4, 2013   #3
NewUser
Thank you for your reply.

Can i also ask the sentence of as a result, the job they did maybe a less-than desirable, do i use it into a proper way or is there any grammar mistakes in this sentence?
dumi 1 / 6793  
Jun 18, 2013   #4
Nowadays, an increasing number of people are concerned about whether the unpaid community service should be a compulsory part in high school.

some people think that student need to use their free time to do some volunteer works work for local community.

.... Start sentences with capital letters. It's difficult for others to identify your sentences when you present your essay in this manner :(
Note; student needs / students need

Firstly, students are not qualified to do most ofthe volunteer jobs

if a student who is trained for nothing to teach children how to play football, the children can be injured by without getting any information for how to protect themselves and prevent this kind of situation.

... pay attention to punctuation!
If a student who is not trained to coach children on how to play football, may not be able to prevent children from getting injured during their practice sessions.


Home / Writing Feedback / Students should find the field they are interested in and contribute to it.
ⓘ Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms for professional help:

Best Writing Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳