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IELTS TASK2 Where students should learn to be a good person? Home or school?



Joycelai 2 / 4  
Jul 1, 2021   #1
Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the place to learn this.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.



Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

My essay:
People have different views about where children are supposed to learn to be a good person, either from home or school. In my opinion, I believe that both places are definitely important for each kid to cultivate their maturity.

It's generally considered that parents are the closest people in every children's life, which means that they could have a great impact on their kids. For example, when children encounter problems in their life, parents would usually be the first choice to talk to and to ask for help, and the advice that they give would also shapes the cognition of children. Moreover, parents play a vital role to introduce children the rules of society before entering school since they are the only access to the outside world during childhood. Therefore, parenting is literally necessary for children to become well-behaved.

On the other hand, school is the place where children spend the most of time in their life, taking the major responsibility to educate them. The role model in a school should be the teachers, who not only pass academic knowledge down to students, but also teach them about manners and rules. From the point that children start going to school, they would experience the feeling of living in a society, which allows them to learn how to be a good member among all.

In conclusion, it may be argued that parents or school teach children about life rules, I believe that both can give them proper education in each period of life, because they both play a crucial part in children's growing process.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 15347  
Jul 2, 2021   #2
The essay more than meets the word requirement for the presentation. When it comes to proper response formatting though, the writing proves to not meet the discussion requirements. Rather than presenting 2 public opinion explanations prior to a personal point of view, the analysis is only from the writer's perspective. The discussion instruction for the public views are based on the "some people" and " others" reference.

Each point of view needs to be explained to the reader in a manner that boosts the C + C and GRA scores. Through the use of 3rd party pronouns for the public opinion and 1st person references for the personal opinion. This essay totally avoids that scoring aspect for some reason. The clarity of the explanation is based on properly identifying who owns or proposes it. That is why the reasoning paragraph for this discussion is divided into 3 parts, one for every represented point of view.
OP Joycelai 2 / 4  
Jul 2, 2021   #3
@Holt
Thank you so much, I didn't realize the problem until this.


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