Nowadays students have more opportunities to study abroad - whats your view on this?

advantage and disadvantage of studying abroad

Could you please give me some advice on this essay? Can you tell me ho­w much band score can I get? thank you
Topic: In the past, when students did a university degree, they tended to study in their own country. Nowadays, they have more opportunity to study abroad.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of this development?

Nowadays, when the quality of life improves remarkably, despite finding a job in the hometown, the trend of studying abroad of young people who graduated from universities increases dramatically. In this essay, I will discuss both the benefits and drawbacks of this problem.

On the one hand, there are several reasons why adolescents usually have partialities study in different countries. The first reason is they can have more opportunities to improve their language skills. For example, my friend has learned in Korea for 2 years, thus she had more chance to talk to a lot of native speakers so her ability to speak and listen boots substantially. In addition, studying abroad is actually an interesting experience for foreign students to study and meet lots of different people from all over the world. For instance, from each year, the universities in the united states always welcome a thousand of international students from many places in the world, so foreign students can make new friends, and research into the latest culture, broaden their common knowledge, know more about things that they could not find them on books or television shows.

On the other hand, there are a number of disadvantages of studying abroad that people can take into consideration. Firstly, a lot of foreign students underwent cultural shock. They feel lonely in a distant place , no friends, no family, there are too many strange things they have never know before and they do not know how to overcome these difficulties. Secondly, studying abroad is extremely expensive. in order to learn in other country, a student needs financial resources, It a big trouble for many students want to live and study abroad.

In conclusion, studying abroad has both pros and cons, then a foreign student need to think carefully before make a decision to study abroad or not

Your first sentence in the paraphrased introduction does not offer the information as stated in the original. You added information about quality of life, which is not supported in the original presentation. You need to make sure that you do not add information to the presentation because it changes the accuracy of your topic explanation, which is scored in your TA score. You should have simply stated the new version focusing on the discussion topic of students studying abroad instead of their own country.

Your reasoning paragraphs are not evenly developed. Your 2 advantage reasons are far better explained than the disadvantage reasons. If you offer 2 advantages, then offer 2 disadvantages as well. Yes, you did offer 2 disadvantages, but neither were as fully explained as your advantage reasons. So the second reasoning paragraph would be considered under developed in this instance, affecting the C&C score of your essay.

I apologize but I cannot score your essay because that is no longer a free service offered by the forum. To get a scoring based review, you need to make this thread urgent or use our private review service.

Warning! Student scoring = Ban

@Holt
thanks for your help