School Uniform Policy
School uniform has become an endless discussion over the years. It is believed that students ought to wear school costumes in the academic environment. But many others argue that children should be allowed to wear what they want, what makes them feel comfortable. I totally agree that wearing school clothes is a wonderful thing in their childhood and they had better apparel it.
First of all, uniforms create uniformity among students, a disciplined environment. Each school designs school's costume with its meaning and different feelings of pride. Therefore, when wearing the uniforms, students also comprehend that they always need to make effort to glorify their school's name. Otherwise, putting on a uniform also contributes to the discipline of each student from an early age. That is a significant virtue for very human.
Furthermore, school clothes built up an equal environment among students. There is no distinction between them when they apparel the same costume. No matter who they are, come from the wealthy family or the casual income one, they are all identical; having the duplicate chance to acquire knowledge, confidently show their abilities. Besides, the white shirt is also a symbol for the student, a childhood with many emotions, experiences at the very first stage of life. When going through that time, uniforms remind us of our academic path, which is the happiest, most naive period of our life.
In conclusion, this essay acknowledges that wearing uniforms plays a meaningful role at school. Not only does it create an equal environment, but it is also a good habit for students. It brings students several benefits that we cannot able to deny.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 15347 In the prompt restatement, you need to be just as specific as the original prompt when referring to the original discussion basis which is "high school uniforms". Word equivalents should be used to give proper acknowledgement to the premise of the discussion. The equivalent for high school is "secondary education" and uniforms could be attire, dress, or livery. That way the Lexical Resource knowledge of the student can be given an early high assessment in relation to the prompt.
Now, the discussion asks the writer to consider which policy is the best one, not whether he agrees or disagrees with the policies (to an extent). So the response of the writer veered away from the provided discussion consideration. While you did agree or disagree, the correct response format was not utilized (which one you believe to be the correct policy and why). The essay will get a weak TA score due to the existing errors in accuracy and presentation.
You will receive good marks for properly using the discussion reference in the 2 reasoning paragraphs. These are acceptable enough and provide enough of a connection between discussion points to be deemed cohesive. It shows a clear understanding of the prompt. So I guess it was only the lack of English word knowledge that adversely affected the prompt restatement + opinion paragraph?
The concluding summary is acceptable as well. It uses a totally different method of presenting the prompt restatement, the writer's opinion, and the supporting reasons. It should do well in helping improve your final score.As a final note, please work on developing your sentence presentation skills. Although these remain understandable, the lack of proper sentence formation has a tendency to be scored down by the examiner. Focus on connecting word usage in a proper manner.
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