Unanswered [29] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3


TOEFL: Study in home country or study abroad, which choice is the best?


hywb2 5 / 6 4  
May 7, 2012   #1
Question:

Some university students wish to complete their studies in their home country, while others want to experience studying abroad. Which choice is best? Give specific reasons.

With the advent of globalization, there is a proliferation of students going to study abroad. On the other hand, some university students prefer to pursue their education in homeland. Which one is the optimum option? In my opinion, I would study abroad rather than receive my education in home country. Because studying abroad could help students to expand their outlook, acquire science and technology which is not available domestically and nurture students' independence and autonomy.

To begin with, studying abroad is able to enlarge students' vision. You could witness and experience a variety of exotic things including food, clothes, architecture etc in a foreign country on your own if you study abroad, otherwise you can only see them on TV. Take the westerner going to East Asia for example. They will be amazed to find the daily diet of the easterner is rice, obviously different from those of them; and they will be impressive of the elegant using of chopstick as utensil for diner. More important, as a foreigner, you will experience distinct tradition and customs from that of your homeland. For example, the family bond is stronger in East Asia than those in the western; and old people are always respected as the source of wisdom and have higher society status. It is beneficial and important for young people to recognize and understand that there are various cultures in the world and every culture is unique and should be given equal respect. As a result of socking in distinct culture, young people is less likely to be insular mind, even they had parochial outlook before and are more likely tolerant to different culture.

Secondly, studying abroad promotes the communication of science and technology. As to the developing countries, they need advanced science and technology to boost their productivity and economy development. They will benefit a lot from sending students to study in developed countries. For example, some arid and barren African countries have difficulties obtaining and conserving rare water resources. If their students had mastered the related techniques by learning from developed countries, the terrible situation would be significantly improved. Even among the developed countries, it is not uncommon to send students to study in one another. Every country has its strength and weakness in science and technology. One country can improve their weak field by sending students to study abroad.

Finally, studying abroad can nurture students' independence and autonomy. It is conceivable that the students will confront a series of problem which they had never encountered at home. To fulfill their study requirement, they had to adjust themselves promptly to adapt a new environment; they need to get used to local lifestyle as soon as possible, be proficient in foreign language skills and manage their finance well. All these challenge impel them to become independent. In addition, as a result of independency and autonomy, the students will become more confident than before.

Taken together, studying oversea offers you brand-new experiences and evident advantages and the young should be encouraged to pursue education abroad.
dumi 1 / 6,925 1592  
May 7, 2012   #2
Because studying abroad could help students to expand their outlook, acquire the knowledge of more modern science and technology which isare not available domestically and nurture students' independence and autonomy.

I like your introductory para.

To begin with, studying abroad is able to enlargesthe students' vision. You could witness and experience a variety of exotic things including food, clothes, architecture etc in a foreign country on your own if you study abroad, which otherwise you can only be seenthem on TV. Take the westerners going to East Asia for example. They will be amazed to findexperience the daily diet of the easterner diets withtheir isrice being the staple of eastern cuisine , obviously different from those of them; and they will be impressiveed withof the elegant fashion of useing of chopstick as eating utensilsfor diner . More importantly , as a foreigner, you will get the opportunity to explore and experience distinct traditions and customs from thatthose of your homeland. For example, the family bond is stronger(this may sometimes annoy the western examiners....hahaha.... :P)families are more closely knitted in East Asia than those in the westerncompared to the west(no need of ; here) and old people are always respected as the source of wisdom and have higher society status.

Good ideas, good flow and good writing.... with a little more practice you can go for a flying score!!!!!!!
GOOD LUCK :)
OP hywb2 5 / 6 4  
May 7, 2012   #3
Hi dumi, thank very much for your kind advice and revision.

Best wishes for you!


Home / Writing Feedback / TOEFL: Study in home country or study abroad, which choice is the best?
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳