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Ielts: Study at school or get a job?



reiichi 2 / 2  
Aug 31, 2010   #1
Many children are forced to stay at school and study subjects that will be of little value to them in the future. These children may disrupt the education of the majority and should be allowed to leave school early to find a themselves a job.

What are your views?


Many people believe that children should study at school to have more knowledge that prepare better for their future. Others, however, think that these children may disrupt their school work and should be allowed to leave school early to find a job. Personally, I tend to agree with the point of view that student have to be forced to study at school.

First of all, schools offer to students a good environment with experienced professors and high quality programs for studying. It creates the best conditions for students education and can force them to focus on their school work instead of wasting their time to do useless things. Second of all, schools provide lots of academic knowledge to students. Students may learn professional skills, expand their understandings and gain experiences. Therefore, they have more opprotunities to find a job and to be successful in the future. For example, as we know, employer always prefer to hire an employee of high degree who have professional skills.

Nevertheless, it is not unreasonable that some people think that children should interrupt their school work and get a job. Whether children can learn a lot at school, there are many subjects that will be of little value to them in the future. Furthermore, children can learn social skills when they have a job. They can get more experiences that can not be obtained at school. Working helps children be more independent and teach them to esteem and manage the money that they've earned.

Overall, I believe that students should study at school. Even though there are some advantages of leaving school to find a job, studying at school is always the best choice for children's future. There are many ways that can train children to learn independent and social skills instead of getting a job.

Please give me some advices. Thanks in advance ^^

EF_Kevin 8 / 13053  
Sep 1, 2010   #2
Right after this sentence, you should give a sentence that tells why you feel this way. Give a succinct sentence that tells why you feel this way, and then the rest of the essay will be clearer.

For example, as we know, employers always prefer to hire an employee of high degree who have has professional skills.

Okay, this is quite good. One thing I thought of was that another reason to get a job is to discover what you like and what you want to study. That way, you can make a good decision about what to study in school.

Do you have any questions about the corrections I made or the corrections Sandeepkale made?

:-)
OP reiichi 2 / 2  
Sep 2, 2010   #3
Thank you so much ^^
Both of you are so kind! I'll make a correction of it XD


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