Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

IELTS TED Summary (v) David Burkus Why you should know how much your coworkers get paid

Dioba 68 / 104 7  
Nov 18, 2016   #1
Discussing salary is one of the taboo activities that almost all of people never discuss. How much our salary, the next person in our position salaries and office friends salaries are several questions we are never talk in advance and still become a secret. David Burkus, a TED speaker, thinks that if the secrecy of the salaries issues is removed, it will improve sense of fairness and collaboration each worker inside the company. Based on his research and experience, when a company do not make transparency of their employee salaries, so the worker cannot compare with their friends income and it will leads to make the worker feel underpay and discriminated. That's why in the US the law protects worker to discuss about their pay. Moreover, more than two-third from 70000 workers feel they are under pay, and 60% from them have a tendency to quit from the company. That's why transparency about salary is the major purpose to make worker more trust to their company and they can measure about their salary by their self.

Holt [Contributor] - / 9,293 2855  
Nov 18, 2016   #2
Dioba, you know what is obvious about the summary that you wrote? You did not really listen to the whole 7 plus minutes video before writing your essay. If you did, you would have heard two of the important and keyword terms that the talk was all about. Those two words are Information Asymmetry and Pay Transparency. Both terms help to explain the basis of the facts and figures that your current summary indicates. It explains the whole point of Burkus' talk. You have to train yourself to listen to the whole audio or watch the whole video file because the important aspects could be explained later on in the speech, as in the case of this talk.

Information Asymmetry talks about the need to be open about information regarding the hiring of a person. It depicts the importance or drawbacks of allowing employees to share information about the salary. While Pay Transparency discusses how employees use the transparent information regarding the hiring process, specifically the salary being paid workers who happen to work the same job. The explanation about negotiation skills in this respect was something that should have been included in your summary. The aforementioned information would have proven the usability of pay transparency because the speaker cited well known examples or people who had used the same process successfully in running their own companies. The Pay Transparency talk shows that it creates a healthy competition among workers among other things.

In my opinion, your summary would have been perfect if it was done in 2 paragraphs. The first paragraph explains the first half of the discussion and the second half, discusses the relevant information coming from the final part of the talk. That way the speech is represented in a balanced and well informed manner, even though it is presented in summary form.

Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS TED Summary (v) David Burkus Why you should know how much your coworkers get paid