Steven Johnson, TED' speakers explained about transformation of ideas became great inventions. In the past, most of inventors find a good way to making fun, one of them are discovered inventions to making satisfied for their life. For example, typewritter was invention which in started from music invention. Honestly, we should don't forget about history because from the older inventions could make someone more thought regarding next inventions.
(Summary TED Video) How play leads to great inventions
Alfin, please include the link to the video next time you post a similar TED video so that we can review it on you behalf. We need to be able to watch the video for ourselves in order to better advise you regarding the content of your essay. At this point, I can offer you a general review based upon what you have written.
Sadly, I am not satisfied with the summary that you wrote because it is confusing to read. There is no sense of logic to what you are saying and the continuity is quite dizzying to follow. One minute, you are discussing the typewriter and in the same sentence, the typewriter somehow turned into a discussion about music. How did that happen? I am sure that is not how that information was presented in the video that you viewed.
The mere length of your essay, which is too short for it to be considered a complete and informative summary, will already tell the reviewer that you have not written an informative and well developed summary. The grammar problems will further promote that idea since it is difficult to follow your flow of thought within the discussion.
You even added a personal opinion at the end with your final sentence, which as you know, is not allowed because you are only being asked to summarize the report and not offer an opinion. So that means that points will be deducted in the task accuracy portion.
Sadly, I am not satisfied with the summary that you wrote because it is confusing to read. There is no sense of logic to what you are saying and the continuity is quite dizzying to follow. One minute, you are discussing the typewriter and in the same sentence, the typewriter somehow turned into a discussion about music. How did that happen? I am sure that is not how that information was presented in the video that you viewed.
The mere length of your essay, which is too short for it to be considered a complete and informative summary, will already tell the reviewer that you have not written an informative and well developed summary. The grammar problems will further promote that idea since it is difficult to follow your flow of thought within the discussion.
You even added a personal opinion at the end with your final sentence, which as you know, is not allowed because you are only being asked to summarize the report and not offer an opinion. So that means that points will be deducted in the task accuracy portion.
hai arlen
i have some suggestions for you
hope it works
... explained about the transformation of ideas ...
In the past, most of the inventors find a good way tomakingmake(infinity verb) fun, one of them are ...
For example,typewrittertypewriter <<< (careful with your spelling) was invention which in started from music invention. Honestly, we should don'tdo not forget about history ...
thanks
i have some suggestions for you
hope it works
... explained about the transformation of ideas ...
In the past, most of the inventors find a good way to
For example,
thanks