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The table gives information about the outcome of two observation between 1997 and 2006


ryan31 65 / 96 15  
Sep 28, 2016   #1
The table gives information about the outcome of two observation between 1997 and 2006. This event is important for most people which is consist of external and internal communication of people's job. Overall, the essential skill for external communication is dealing with people. After that, listening to partnerships carefully was the most important ability in the internal communication.

As can be seen in external communication table 60 % employers believed dealing with people was necessary in 1997 and increased gradually to 65 % in 2006. Percentage of advising or caring for customers or clients is 36% in 1997 and changed in 2006 to 39%. In 1997, citizen think selling a product or service was no needed in their job, at the last position at 24% and decreased slightly by 3% in 2006

On the other hand, there are six components in the internal communication. The highest percentage is listening partnerships carefully at 38% in 1997 and rose by 9% in 2006. The lowest responded in 1997, making speeches or presentations at 7% and increased gradually to 11% in 2006.




eve01 24 / 40 5  
Sep 28, 2016   #2
hello ryan ^.^
your essay good enough but i would like to give some notes for your essay

... the outcome of two observationsbetween 1997 and 2006. {you can put another choice without shown years or numbers in introduction >> over a ninth-year period

After that , { you can use other conjunction such as Meanwhile, while or furthermore etc.. } listening to partnerships carefully ...

keep writing ^.^
justivy03 - / 2,367 607  
Sep 28, 2016   #3
Hi Riandi, please find my share of suggestions below;

- observations between 1997 and 2006.
- After that, listeningListening to partnerships

- As it can be seen in external communication
- table, 60 % of employers
- In 1997, citizenpeople ( I believe this is a more appropriate term ) think selling a product
- or service was not needed in their job,

- is listening to partnerships carefully at 38%
- The lowest one responded in 1997,

There you have it Riandi, I hope the above remarks, however minor, will be able to help you in your revision and for future writing reference, in an analysis, make sure that it is as accurate as you can, mind the minor details of the given diagram of information and be sure to create an objective and straight forward analysis.
Att98 5 / 7  
Sep 29, 2016   #4
hello ryan31, here i left comment for you.

The table gives ==>(you can paraphrase the word with shows, describes, illustrates, intences) information about the outcome of two observations between 1997 and 2006.
Overall,it can be seen that, the essential skill for external ...

On the other hand (you can paraphrase the word with in either way, on the other side, in spite of that) , there are six components...
rizaldohabibie 19 / 35  
Sep 29, 2016   #5
Hi..
I have some points in your essay..

This event is important for most people: you can change it into essential, fundamental, crucial to enhance your lexical resource

which is consist of external and internal ...

I hope it helps..
Alamsyah Ismail 24 / 43  
Sep 29, 2016   #6
Hello Ryan31
There are a twice advice from me, attract your attention if you wish

As (subj) can be seen in external ...
.....there are no subject in your sentence

product or service was no(t) needed in their job
.....needed=verb. you should write no with t before verb. expect for noun.


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