IELTS Writing Task 2 Is technological development positive or negative for distant work and learning

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible.

Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Stepping into the 21st century, not only does technological advance provided inexpensive and efforless to equip allow all sorts of employers access to distant working, but it also facilitates the young a virtual classroom approached from home. I believe that inhabitants all over the world benefit from advanced technologies.

To commence, human beings effectively avoid the attack of risky infectious pleagues thanks to the use of technologies. Without daily touching and having a conversation to others, those who work and study at home hardly face up with the capacity of dangerous germs which live through lungs and kidneys in the vast majority. For instance, due to the outbreaking of Covid-19 pandemic, Vietnamese governing agencies have enacted the law for virtual education for both primary, secondary and high schools for a year to control the widespread in society. Students are forced to attend online classroom through Google Meeting or Zoom platform. They are more likely to have access to different teaching methods and visual learning styles. As the result, the percentage of young adolescents infected by Corona virus in 2021 was much lower than the old whilst their learning assessment was still retained.

Moreover, only when staying at home and working by intelligient technologies do workers seize an opportunity to save their transportation expenditure. Because of the limitation of fossil fuels and high expenditure for gas taxes, distantly working from home provides employers with money-savings and they can use them for other special needs. For example, in March 2022, the world's inhabitants had to face up with the everyday increase in gas and fuel price because of the war between Ukraine and Russia. Therefore, IT workers or those who were working for a distant company are the most beneficial ones because they do not need to daily go out for their job. Furthermore, with the development of technology and Internet availability, customers of restaurant could distantly order their food whenever they have a demand. In short, both clients and business companies benefit from that because users are fulfilled their demands and restaurant owners would gain much money thanks to the additional fee of delivery.

To recapitulate, innovation in technology provides human with loads and loads of beneficial features, especially, avoiding infectious diseases and money-savings in transportation.

When writing an opinion essay, the writer must realize that he has to target the completeness by which he presents his information. His opinion must be fully developed and supported by only one example and reason, unless otherwise specified by the writing instructions. Normally, for 2 questions, only one reason is needed and expanded upon in the 2 paragraphs. By concentrating on the development of the explanation, the writer avoids creating under developed reasoning presentationss.

In this particular essay, the writer has a well developed student related reasoning paragraph. He focused on one topic, Covid-19 and its effects on learning, while developing the reasons that these proved to be beneficial in the end for students. The final explanation, using the outcome of the virtual classes was an excellent way to close the paragraph.

The second reason did not fair as well as the first one though. That is because the writer got too busy with providing reasons, rather than providing solid explanations as he did the first time. By providing more than one reason in this paragraph, but not having enough room to fully expand on each discussion, the second discussion topic became superfluous and lacking in explanation development. That situation removed the cohesiveness of the presentation. Food delivery, as a consideration for workers does not really relate to the way that workers complete their jobs remotely. It is a reason that does not fit within the requirements and focus of the original discussion. It should not have been introduced in the paragraph. The focus should have remained work related.

The concluding summary could have been better presented. The reasons provided should have been divided into 2 seperate sentences with a final repeat of the writer's opinion also present in the paragraph. A total of 3 sentences should be present in this paragraph to be considered a complete recap of the previous points.