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Technology devices brings merits toward the users, particularly on their personal relationships

Riiskacha03 31 / 34 5  
Jan 22, 2016   #1
The use of electronic media has a negative effect on personal relationships between people.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Technology device brings merits toward the users, particularly on their relationship personally. Technology is designed to ease human activities. However, by observing people social behaviour changing, I immensely agree that electronic may lead to lack in public connectivity.

Taking telephone as an example, it is justified to say that it had changed the way people greeting others. Back to years ago, when texting and calling or even chatting was uncommon, friends would keep in touch one to another by hangout together regularly. In addition, family member who was working far from the home town, would back intensively to visit his parents or brothers and sisters, since he could not contact them for a while. It makes clear that, in old days, citizens tend to have direct interaction among them.

In these days and ages, when almost all inhabitants around the world have such kind of electronic media, the way of its users to communicate has experienced an evolution. Start from the accustom of talking to others through call and text, until the internet connection also introduce chatting as the replacement of texting. It caused public stuck with their phone due to the attractive features on it rather than arrange an appointment to meet their relatives. On the other hand, actually technology bring some advantages in our life, such as make our work is easier so we have more time to do other work.

To sum up, technology device brings ease to our life, but create a distance among people personally, even though they are in a reachable place. It is changing how people find out and react toward other's condition. According to this, I do believe that those electronics bring merit.
vangiespen - / 4,133 1449  
Jan 27, 2016   #2
Make sure that you use the correct words to describe certain aspects of the essay. For example, use the term electronic media when discussing the technology that connects peopled. When you say electronic, all you mean is that something uses electricity to power it. It does not refer to the electronic media that the prompt indicated. When you use the wrong keywords, your essay will sauffer due to the content becoming conflicted in meaning or usage.

While I agree with your opinion that electronic media brings positive effects, you should have balanced out the essay by indicating a simple discussion of the perceived negative effects so that your personal opinion would have been given a stronger position of discussion. Keep in mind that a balanced debate always requires two sides of the issue to be presented. In this case, since you were being asked for the extent of your agreement disagreement to the issue, discussing both extents would have helped solidify your presentation and garner a better score.

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